Posted on 05/25/2015 10:05:12 AM PDT by Kaslin
I have no desire to pile on with more comments about Josh Duggar, who appears to be a very serious and committed Christian who has made no excuses for the sins of his youth and who deeply desires to make a positive impact for the Lord in the years ahead. I simply want to share some redemptive thoughts, supplementing some of the excellent statements made by others, including former governor Mike Huckabee and Southern Baptist leader Russell Moore.
1. Jesus really does change people. While critics of the Duggar family want to indict them (along with other, evangelical Christians, especially those with large families) for Josh’s actions, and while many seem ready to throw Josh under the bus, the fact is that while he did sin grievously, through repentance, faith and counseling, he became a new man. Jesus really does transform sinners.
How many of us did wicked things as teenagers? I was shooting heroin at the age of 15 and broke into some houses and even stole money from my own father before being radically converted at the age of 16. I was profane, filled with pride, anger, and lust, yet the Lord had mercy on me and totally turned my life around.
Some of us continued to live like this into our adult years, only to find mercy and new life then, meaning that the transformation was even more dramatic.
For me, the first lesson from this story is this: Whoever you, whatever you’ve done, there is hope in the Lord. As Mike Huckabee said, “‘inexcusable’ . . . doesn’t mean ‘unforgivable.’”
As Paul wrote to the Corinthians, “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).
2. There’s no excuse for sin, so own up to it. In today’s culture, almost no one is guilty of anything. It’s someone else’s fault, someone else’s responsibility, not our own. We’re all victims, and the reason we do bad things is because someone else wronged us. Isn’t that how we think today?
I’ve even heard athletes apologize for some really heinous actions by saying, “I’m not happy with the way things happened,” rather than saying, “What I did was wrong and I have no excuses. Please forgive me. I’m seeking to get to the root of my problems and address them.”
What a vast difference between the two attitudes.
As Proverbs states, “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy” (Proverbs 28:13).
According to the accounts we’ve all heard, Josh confessed his sin to his parents as well as to the proper authorities, and as a family, they worked through the issues. Now, half a lifetime later (he’s 27 and is married with four children), when confronted with a police report about his past, he did not minimize his sin nor did he excuse it. He also resigned from the fine Christian organization for whom he worked, not wanting to bring any negative attention to their work.
When I see someone respond like this, I am filled with hope. In fact, over the years, I’ve seen that people who committed uglier sins but took full responsibility and repented did far better than those who committed less serious sins and tried to sweep them under the rug.
3. Even godly families have kids who mess up badly. Nancy and I only had two kids, and we sought to be godly parents and set godly examples. Yet our older daughter went through a real period of rebellion in her teen years.
As parents, we felt miserable, and I would wonder what I was doing wrong.
Of course, we dealt with her rebellion head on and prayed like crazy for her to really encounter the Lord, but while it was happening, it was terribly deflating spiritually. What kind of father am I? How can I be so ineffective?
Today, we all laugh about those years, and our daughter, who is now 37 and is a devoted wife and mother, is so grateful for the way she was raised. (She and Nancy are the best of friends and are in constant contact.)
The fact that the Duggars, who successfully raised 19 children in the Lord (who can imagine that?), had to deal with one of their kids committing serious sexual sin at 14 should actually encourage other parents rather than discourage them. And perhaps, they can teach us today how this tragic incident helped them come together as a family and draw closer to the Lord.
4. Josh can be an ambassador on behalf of the abused, even helping the abusers as well. While it can feel like your life is over when your past, largely private sins become public (how many of us would like for that to happen?), the fact is that Josh’s future can be bright in the Lord.
He can call on others who are sinning to come clean and get help, using his own example redemptively. And he can encourage those who have been abused to realize that they are not guilty and should not feel shame, also encouraging churches to embrace those who come for help rather than making them feel as if there is something wrong with them.
Why should those who have suffered abuse be stigmatized? They should be our priority for healing and restoration.
5. We need to be careful how we judge. There are many fans of the Duggars who are upset with what they feel is a witch hunt against a godly family, representing one more attempt to remove them from reality TV. (Let me say without qualification that there is life after reality TV, and if the Duggars never do another broadcast, their lives can still be overwhelmingly blessed.)
But would we have had this same attitude of mercy and forgiveness if this was the child of a gay couple? Would we have said, “This proves that gay parents are no good!”?
I certainly believe that kids deserve a mom and a dad and that, optimally, they will do best with a mom and dad, but I don’t indict all gay couples because of the failings of one of their kids
So, if you want to show mercy, be consistent. We can all fall into the trap of selective compassion.
6. There are consequences to our actions, but with God, our worst mistakes can become stepping stones to spiritual growth.
Most of us have done things we wish we could take back, and in some cases, the consequences of our bad choices and sinful actions last for decades. Yet with the Lord, no matter how great the stigma of our sin, if we will humble ourselves before Him, He can take those stumbling blocks and turn them into stepping stones, to the point that the worst things that ever happened to us become the best things that ever happened to us.
To the core of His being, God is a redeemer, and I’m personally praying and believing that for Josh Duggar and his entire family, God will turn this painful situation around for greater good.
Let’s watch and see.
I don’t think they are allowed on FR, are they?
I am not bound by piety or christian behavior. As such, i am free to express my opinion about child molesters as I see fit.
Knew a family like this. Not quite as strict. One of the girls goes to a party and gets date raped. Tells her mom and gets blamed. Is forbidden to report it because it might bring shame to the family.
People like this disgust me. They are like the pharisees of old. Nice and clean on the outside, but inside full of dead men’s bones.
How would you like to be a girl in that house? Think about it. You are not allowed to be anything other than a homemaker. You are not allowed to go to college and figure out what YOU want to do with YOUR life. And, oh, BTW, your brother? Yeah the one who sneaks into your room at night? Yeah, do the chores for him.
Sick.
Josh Duggar is the abuser; don't you think his is probably the full dish?
I ask this in all sincerity, because I honestly don't understand it....we would discuss this kind of revelation if it pertained to anyone else, but the Duggars are considered somehow sacred and off-limits.
Why do they get a pass? I have to run out for a bit; I'll check the thread when I get back.
Imagine... it must be a nightmare. Most parents try to protect their children. And then your own child... OMG. What should parents do in this situation?
I can only imagine these parents trying to figure out the best route:
Have the child arrested? Would that involve prison time? A Class A Misdemeanor means up to a year in prison. Not sure if that applies to juveniles, too... If so, a 14yo would be sent to juvenile hall, right?
If so, what happens when this kid gets out of juvenile hall? Couldn't prison make matters worse? Then what happens when he returns home?
Or, if he's simply removed from the home, where will he be placed? With another family, only to do the same thing? Or, in a facility, where he might learn from other inmates how to continue the behavior?
Given all these questions, I can understand why this father decided to seek advice at his church, then send the son away to a Christian treatment program involving hard labor for three months, then bring him to a state trooper to scare him some more, and then have him confess and apologize to the family and everyone else, and continue to tell people.
I hope the girls received counseling, too, and I hope they weren't taught to blame themselves. We don't really know what was done for them, besides the confession and apologies they received.
See post #104 above.
I agree about the parents knowing best. I sincerely believe that JimBob and Michelle have tried their best at all times to follow God’s will. But when I watched them it was to make myself a better parent. Now I know I don’t have that much that I want to learn from them anymore.
Given the dynamic, the forgiveness was foregone as God’s will.
If he’d been a couple of years older, he’d have gone to prison. Good he didn’t cause the convicts have a code of honor when it comes to molesting children.
Just read it. That goes beyond anything I could have imagined. Horrible.
I was a Prosecutor in VA for about 25 years.
We used to see this all the time. It was very much like the Celeb who gets caught cheating and then claims “sex addiction”. No, you aren’t a sex addict ... you were just horny and got caught.
I can’t think of an instance of sex abuse like unto this case where suddenly Jesus was used as a shield and/or an excuse. Suddenly, Jesus and God was everywhere. Needless to say, we never bought it even if there was a history of “religion”. We always found that if there was a history of “religion” that that too was just used as cover before they got caught. It is amazing to me how many people, how many Christians, let down their guard when someone says “I’m a Christian”. Perhaps it’s the Prosecutor in me, but I need a whole lot more than that.
The info was sent to the Oprah show who canceled the show and sent the info to the local police.
That may hold true for adults but from what I have read recidivism rates for juveniles who commit sexual offenses are generally quite a bit lower.
“The info was sent to the Oprah show who canceled the show and sent the info to the local police.”
And THAT is how it should be/have been handled. Too bad it took an infidel like Oprah to do the right thing.
Please gag me.
Child molestation is the worst kind of evil. Very few people are sexually attracted to children. Very few people raised with morality seek power so badly they will hurt innocents to get it.
MURDERERS turn against child molestors.
The Christian religion is NOT a magic cloak. There are bad people within all religions and without them.
If it isn’t ok for Roman Polanski to rape that girl, then it is not ok for Josh Duggar to rape many girls. But for the statute of limitation they would both be in jail. Where they should be. People wanting to have sex with children never lose the urge. How can we trust them?
Pure, unadulterated evil. Those defending them mystify me.
Me as well.
If Free Republic becomes a site that officially or by majority supports these sick people, I will be out of here. After 15 years I think.
A note detailing the incidents had been placed in a book lent to a church congregant...one story has it that they were notes written by Jim Bob and forgotten, the other was that a note from one of the victims secretly placed into that book. The congregant, learning that the family was going to be on the Oprah show sent the note(or copy?) to the Oprah show who canceled the interview and sent the contents to the cops. The congregant was “supposedly worried that the local cops wouldn’t do anything”.
That was the official account as of Saturday night. The question Me and some Freepers had was why was the info sent to Oprah instead of the local CPS. CPS can be real NAZI’s over this sort of stuff.
He was raised as a Christian, wasn’t he? I don’t understand this defence.
Playing doctor is innocent only if both people are way below puberty. If one is above and the other is below, that’s molestation.
Anyone who doesn’t remove the molester from their home as soon as they know, is putting their pride or ego above their daughters’ safety.
“If it isn’t ok for Roman Polanski to rape that girl, then it is not ok for Josh Duggar to rape many girls. But for the statute of limitation they would both be in jail. Where they should be. People wanting to have sex with children never lose the urge. How can we trust them?”
What are the recidivism rates between 14 year olds fondling sisters( who get caught, disciplined, counseled and scared out of their gourds) vs. 30 something year olds raping unrelated minors who then flee the country?
There are nonsequitors in your questioning. As for questions of trust...yeah I agree with you!
There are plenty of young men brought up in oppressive religious households. They don’t all turn to underaged children for their sexual pleasure. He made a choice.
All kids at puberty should be informed that once they come of age, they need to avoid any suggestion of sexuality with little children or THEIR LIVES WILL BE OVER FOREVER. Yes, even if you are 14 or 16 you can receive sex offender status for life. As it should be.
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