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My 14-Year-Old Daughter Was Told She Wasn’t Really Raped Because She Didn’t Have an Abortion
Life News ^ | 12/31/14 | Angi Grogg

Posted on 01/02/2015 6:18:35 AM PST by wagglebee

Four years ago, I was going through life like I had it all figured out — perfect family, perfect job, perfect home. Our proud military family was living the American dream — we had it all. On December 21, 2010 — the darkest day of the year, everything changed for us as a family. Little did we know our lives were forever transformed or what that ill-lighted date would come to represent.

Mother’s Day 2011 — the memory of that day is so surreal. It is the day I found out our 14 year old daughter Pyper had been raped by an 18 year old soldier and was pregnant as a result. There was no going back to our perfect life, and this would be the first of many painful days for our family.

Our family has experienced too many low points over the past four years to count. For me, the hardest is a reoccurring nightmare which happens around the same time every year in December. Invariably, over the past three years, instead of making holiday plans, we found ourselves reacting to or reeling from some event resultant from that day in December, 2010.

As 2012 progressed, the fight to right Pyper’s wrong intensified. In December, 2012, we were facing one of the most daunting tasks of our lives. No one could have prepared us for the horrors of what we were about to endure, which included a defense attorney suggesting to our daughter that she wasn’t really raped because she failed to abort. We spent the week preceding December 21st sitting in a military courtroom half-way across the country praying that our ordeal would end. It didn’t. What prosecutors told us should have been a slum-dunk case involving not only forcible rape, but strict liability statutory rape, inexplicably ended in a 3-3 hung jury. In the military, this means the rapist is acquitted. On the 21st — that same dark date, we found ourselves packed inside a minivan, in shock and disbelief, driving a thousand miles to get back home.

Our situation was about to get worse, as our grandson Noah was in danger. In response to our daughter pressing charges, the rapist’s attorney had filed for custody. We’d been warned that this was a common strategy, and with the failure to obtain justice in the criminal trial, the stage had been set for a bitter custody battle in civil court.

Over the next twelve months, we were hit with a deluge of court documents and besieged by harassment and threats. Each day brought a new fear — the distress was consuming, but as our days grew darker, our resolve grew stronger. There was no way we were going to give up! December, 2013 found us sitting in a different courtroom, in a different town, over the same dark days as the past three years. This time it wasn’t about right and wrong — we were fighting for our very lives; we were fighting for Noah. Expending every fiber of our being, down to our last breath, we battled for our precious little boy. This time, the outcome would be different.

On the day the court’s decision came in, we didn’t celebrate. Instead, we passed the day in reverent silence with just a few calls to the family and friends who remained. The freedom from our tormentors was final in March, 2014, and we slowly began to regain some of what we lost; to find our new normal.

As December, 2014 clicks by, we still find ourselves looking over our shoulders, watching and waiting; paying close attention to what is happening around us. Our enemy is silent, but we remain vigilant; ready to fight hell itself to protect our “hand-picked” angel. We have our little Noah — our gift, our daughter’s beauty from the ashes.

My husband has this to offer, “There is nothing that can sufficiently prepare you for the trials you face. Although there are many horrible things that could happen, the present conflict is always the worst. What happened yesterday is past, tomorrow is not here, focus on today and no matter what you are up against, keep pressing forward. As a parent or grandparent, you have to stay strong and fight with an unbridled tenacity because at the end of the day, next to God, your family is all that matters.”

It has been by God’s mercy and grace alone that we are where we are. He has taken an act of iniquity and turned it into an act of goodness to bring glory to His name. Our grandson is the ark that carried our family through our darkest days. He has been and is the light in the darkness; the anchor given to us by God to hold us firm in our faith.

LifeNews Note: Angi Grogg is a wife of 20 years and mother of four. She’s the co-founder and a Board Member of Hope After Rape Conception, and a national pro-life speaker and blogger for Save The 1.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: abortion; moralabsolutes; prolife
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To: drunknsage
"Why punish a rape victim with forced pregnancy, pregnancy she didn’t ask for and likely cannot financially support."

None are grounds for killing an innocent human being. The child can be adopted out, either before or after it is born. It is not unknown that the prospective adoptive parents will pay expenses.

"Support the male pill if you don’t like abortion. The male pill will reduce abortion almost completely. It will almost eliminate single motherhood, cash flow sex and financial extortion, and reduce welfare. Imagine the loss of power of progressive politicians without abortion as a rally cry. There is already a push to get the plant the pill is based on imported into the US before manginas, feiminists, politicians, and pharma lobbiests have it banned. Men’s rights groups are already having the seeds sent to members in western nations. This one pill will create a social revolution and put a knife in the heart of progressivism."

A "male pill" will make no difference at all. Totally wishful thinking on your part. Making the punishment for rape mandatory castration and life imprisonment "might" make a difference, but I seriously doubt it.

21 posted on 01/02/2015 7:44:51 AM PST by Wonder Warthog (Newly fledged NRA Life Member (after many years as an "annual renewal" sort))
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To: wbarmy

The 18 year old was wrong but how long had he and the 14 year been seeing each other?


22 posted on 01/02/2015 7:47:34 AM PST by stellaluna
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To: wagglebee

My good friends, a couple who have been childless well into their 40’s (due to a health problem which doesn’t allow her to conceive) just adopted a beautiful 1 month old baby from our local Catholic relief services.

I haven’t met the child yet (they rec’d her just after Christmas) but my understanding is the birth-mother was very young, and her situation may have been much like this story.

They are over the moon with happiness to finally have a baby after many years trying to conceive and then adopt. They have the love of their marriage and extended family, and the financial means to give this baby absolutely everything she needs.

So I read this story and think - great happiness and good CAN come of something so wrong.


23 posted on 01/02/2015 7:54:21 AM PST by PGR88
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To: stellaluna

If there was an 18 year old soldier hanging around my 14 year old daughter, there would be a LOT of questions being asked of this soldier and even more chaperoning from the parents. And from any older siblings.

Avoid even the appearance of evil.


24 posted on 01/02/2015 8:01:51 AM PST by wbarmy (I chose to be a sheepdog once I saw what happens to the sheep.)
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To: njslim

Pretty disgusting story. And one that yields nothing relevant to the charge of rape.


25 posted on 01/02/2015 8:25:14 AM PST by Mrs. Don-o
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To: wbarmy

.........any “hanging around” my 14 year old daughter by an adult male would be in my presence and I don’t have but a minute or two for such matters................


26 posted on 01/02/2015 8:28:46 AM PST by Cen-Tejas (it's the debt bomb stupid)
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To: drunknsage
"Support the male pill if you don’t like abortion."

Yeah! Brilliant! Because:

It's a F&#%ing Utopia!
27 posted on 01/02/2015 8:39:39 AM PST by Mrs. Don-o (Your sarcasm tag: never leave home without it.)
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To: wbarmy

However, and I have three daughters and serve in the DoD so I think of this constantly, how did the 18 year old soldier get private access to the 14 year old girl?


At 14, kids can go nearly anywhere on base. Unfortunately, it’s not realistic for most people to have their teens tied to their hip 24-7.

The story isn’t very clear on how the attack happened. The girl may have been in the wrong place at the wrong time or he may have stalked her and found an opportunity.

All you can do is instill your kids with solid morals and values and teach them situational awareness.


28 posted on 01/02/2015 8:47:22 AM PST by Rides_A_Red_Horse (Why do you need a fire extinguisher when you can call the fire department?)
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To: drunknsage; wita

Your logic is flawed. It works both ways. Why punish a rape victim with forced pregnancy, pregnancy she didn’t ask for and likely cannot financially support.


Do you know anyone who is “the product of rape?” I do and your attitude that they should have been murdered because the sins of their fathers is repugnant.


29 posted on 01/02/2015 8:49:28 AM PST by Rides_A_Red_Horse (Why do you need a fire extinguisher when you can call the fire department?)
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To: Mrs. Don-o

Point of story is to illustrate mindset of military toward
rape (and women in general)

Apparently did not get the point...


30 posted on 01/02/2015 8:51:23 AM PST by njslim
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To: Rides_A_Red_Horse

Having been an 18 year old military member, I am super sensitive to base activities and what kids can do.

And in this day and age, my 14 year old (actually 13), does not go anywhere without another member of her family.

She reads the news and knows she can be a target.

As once said “The best way to not be in a bar fight at 2:00 in the morning, is to not be in a bar at 2:00 in the morning).


31 posted on 01/02/2015 8:54:55 AM PST by wbarmy (I chose to be a sheepdog once I saw what happens to the sheep.)
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To: winner3000

Amen.


32 posted on 01/02/2015 9:01:20 AM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: wbarmy

And in this day and age, my 14 year old (actually 13), does not go anywhere without another member of her family.

She reads the news and knows she can be a target.


She’s blessed to have such wise parents.

Unfortunately, there are a lot of young teens who try to be older than they are. Most (not all) 18 year old soldiers aren’t thinking with the right head. This isn’t a good combination.


33 posted on 01/02/2015 9:03:44 AM PST by Rides_A_Red_Horse (Why do you need a fire extinguisher when you can call the fire department?)
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To: wbarmy

You will find that you cannot supervise teens every second until they are safely married. At some point they need to test their maturity and prepare for adulthood. Teens might have sex, even deeply religious teens. Best for parents to be a bit more understanding of human nature and be prepared to love and accept your children during and after these trial adult years. Stop pearl clutching and realize your children are no different inside than you were at that age.


34 posted on 01/02/2015 9:11:07 AM PST by Yaelle
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To: CyberAnt

Sometimes the storms of life are not on our timetable .. they just seem to come out of nowhere .. but the true test is how we handle the storm.

***
Well said!


35 posted on 01/02/2015 9:11:55 AM PST by Bigg Red (Congress, do your duty and repo his pen and his phone.)
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To: Yaelle

1. I might not be able to supervise them every second, but I can make sure that the majority of the places they go and have access to are supervised.

2. I train them up to be situationally aware and to know what the consequences to their life might be if something is allowed to happen.

3. God does not give me an option. I am responsible for them until they leave as an adult, and ultimately I will stand before Him for what I might or might not have done to protect their (2 boys and 3 girls) purity.

4. Love and acceptance are a given, but have absolutely nothing to do with my duties and responsibilities as the father. Judges 15:24 is not a hope, but a determination of what I will do, to the best of my ability.

5. And it is not their human nature I really worry about, it is the horn-dog 18 year old male prowling the post.


36 posted on 01/02/2015 9:31:36 AM PST by wbarmy (I chose to be a sheepdog once I saw what happens to the sheep.)
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To: CyberAnt

Reminds me of a great one, my favorite, that I read here on Freep...

Don’t tell God how big your storm is,
Tell the storm how big your God is.


37 posted on 01/02/2015 9:50:04 AM PST by gnickgnack2 (QUESTION obama's AUTHORITY)
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To: njslim

I am sorry I misunderstood you as as repeating, without disapproval, Napoleon’s view. I should have directed my remark to Napoleon.


38 posted on 01/02/2015 9:53:10 AM PST by Mrs. Don-o
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To: gnickgnack2

Exactly ..!!!!!


39 posted on 01/02/2015 10:03:54 AM PST by CyberAnt ("The hope and changey stuff did not work, even a smidgen.")
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Anyone?

Why was this tried in a Military court as opposed to a civil court? I realized
it involved a member of the military but isn’t there civil courts to deal with rape also?


40 posted on 01/02/2015 10:05:20 AM PST by deport
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