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Back when I was a Lieutenant in '77, I made the idiotic mistake of engaging in a discussion about leadership with two fellow lieutenants who were black. The discussion was about why so few black candidates made it through OCS successfully and I forwarded the theory that leadership wasn't fostered in the black community - that it a "every man for himself" environment and that there were few fathers to give a guide for leadership.

My supposed friends went apocalyptic on me, screaming (literally - in the middle of the Commissioned Officer's Mess)that I was a racist and went directly to my commanding officer with the charge. The only thing that saved me and my career was another black officer who went to the colonel and vouched for me - and the colonel had a fast-fill billet to lead a shooting team and I was sent there and out of the way.

Believe me, I never discussed anything at all about race again with any of my fellow officers. I did look for officer potential among all of my troops and got commissioning programs for as many as I was able - but honest discussion is never possible.

“My supposed friends went apocalyptic on me, screaming (literally - in the middle of the Commissioned Officer’s Mess)that I was a racist and went directly to my commanding officer with the charge.”

It seems inevitable that whites who spend lots of time with blacks will eventually be called racist.

- but honest discussion is never possible.

The truth is not always pretty, comfortable or what we desire.

The truth here is quite ugly and will never be honestly discussed in polite company. This topic can only be discussed honestly in private with trusted friends.