DNR's are interesting documents. I've known DNR's that were intubated...on their Doctor's advice and agreed to it. And got over what they "had" and went on their merry way.
I've know full codes..that lingered on..for weeks and months...on ventilators...that had no chance of living. And eventually coded and died.
I'm not sure why anyone would tell you that about your now husband 15 yrs ago...but he must have been very sick...and some healthcare worker was an ass. I've seen too many!!
I'm glad he survived...and you are doing well together!
I'm a DNR...and I work in the HealthCare biz....But a DNR doesn't say you withhold ALL care....it just says...we aren't going to run a CODE on you..if you stop breathing or your heart stops. Period. Anyone tells you different is not telling you the truth.
FWIW-
I do not remember everything about that time. But, I do remember receiving a call to get there to say “good-bye”. This was at the 2nd hospital, before the VA. I rushed there and ran into ICU. The nurse had no idea why the doctor had told me that. I signed a form that day stating he was never to be in his room again.
I still will not sign a DNR and neither will my husband.
Thank you, we are doing well and intend to for many years. The VA really does take great care of him.