All you’re gonna end up with is a cake full of fecal matter and urine because, conservatives aren’t human.
Promptly have any cake delivered to a laboratory and tested for those very things.
If present, then call a lawyer with one phone and the health department with another.
I was just going to say I wouldn’t eat the cake. I’d throw it away as soon as I got it out of the bakery. I would order it just to fight fire with fire.