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Yefra, thank you for saying that. I think "false empathy" is a fairly common thing. People see a Downs kid drooling or looking not quite ready to model in an L.L. Bean catalog, and they think, "Oh, the poor child. It's not worth living if you've got a twist in your spine and someone else has to wipe your chin. Poor kid should have never been born."

Or they think that about an old person who needs help with his poop, or a head-trauma patient with challenges to his independent living. And the "empathetic" person starts thinking Belgium is pretty darn compassionate with their euthanasia program.

When actually, the "sufferers" themselves are willing to accept life, even with diminished capacities. Because you can't know what just another day of living means to a person who lives, likes sunlight on his bare shoulder or gets a kick out of strawberry jelly toast, loves his dada, and drools.

The best description of “false empathy” I’ve heard was about two soldiers who were friends, sent with their green unit to fight their first battle, just a small skirmish. Both very scared, and neither having seen much blood, injury or death in their lives.

Well, one of them was grazed with a bullet to his head, that knocked him out but was otherwise just a skin injury. But being a head wound, it bled profusely, so he was a mess, though he just needed a few stitches and some aspirin.

He came to when his friend was about to “put him out of his misery”, by shooting him. However his friend could just not bring himself to pull the trigger. So the wounded man leapt to his feet, and took off running to the company area.

His friend, sobbing uncontrollably, took off after him, still intent on shooting him. Right then, their company commander had just sat down next to his field desk, with the company first sergeant, to discuss the map they were using.

First runs by the bleeding guy, who really did look a mess. Then his sobbing friend, waving his rifle maybe hoping somebody would stop his friend so he could shoot him. Without a word, the first sergeant takes off running after the two of them, leaving the company commander wondering what in blazes was going on.

All survived the war.

“Because you can’t know what just another day of living means to a person who lives, likes sunlight on his bare shoulder or gets a kick out of strawberry jelly toast, loves his dada, and drools.”

That is beautiful, Mrs. Don-O, so well said!