Posted on 09/05/2010 9:07:19 PM PDT by Rhonda Robinson
Parenting is a tough job but a lot of people are doing it. In fact, currently there are 150 million active parents in the United States. The big question these people face is how to do it?
Does that quote strike you as odd?
It was the introduction to an article on parenting trends. Aside from stating the obvious, the opening line puts parenting in the same category as camping, skydiving or canoeing–just another interesting and popular hobby.
Assuming the author of said article is not visiting from another planet, one can only attribute the astounding lack of understanding of human nature, to the barrage of boneheaded parenting philosophies we have been subjected to. It began in the 1960s. Anything that resembled the values of “the greatest generation” was deemed foul and tainted. It only took a couple generations of parenting advice, heavy-laden with leftist social politics and psychology to come up with this mess…
(Excerpt) Read more at newsrealblog.com ...
Bingo! When I was going through my school age years (late 60's thru late 70's) virtually every teacher had their fanny paddle prominently displayed on their desk. Rumors along amongst the students like "air holes in Mr. So-n-so's paddle makes it swing harder" kept everybody in line. It was common for guys in my high school to have a hunting rifle or shotgun in a rack in the window of their truck during hunting season. Pocket knives were common, too. Never had any problems with school shootings or stabbings. Not even that many fights, either, maybe one or two a year.
The only rule I agree with slightly is number one, about gender neutrality. Not to say I think kids should be raised completely without gender cues. But as an adult with a young son, I have realized that my parents never thought of getting us trucks, trains, and other “boy” toys because we were girls. I really enjoy playing with my son and his more “analytical” toys, and I wonder how my brain might have developed differently with exposure to those stimuli.
Parent:This is going to hurt me more than it’s going to hurt you.
Child:Why?
Parent:Because you have faild me and your self.
Ping to post
I have no idea nor do I care.
No, just not projecting on them abilities that they don't yet have. People do that and they place a burden on the child that should not be there. I would no more expect a toddler to understand the concepts of obedience and rebellion then I would expect them to drive a car. This allows me to put my energy into dealing with them at a level they can grasp rather then frustrating myself by trying to get them to feel things that they currently can not.
I haven't seen the two year old that doesn't want to please his or her mother.
Pleasing their mother brings rewards. They don't want to do it out of some abstract feeling.
My grandchild, even before the age of two, in fact at barely one year of age, internalized parental prohibitions.
You mean that they had trained her using the reward/punishment system and she remembers some of them for an extended period.
The earliest manifestation of this that I recall is the prohibition against ingesting found bits of detritus. Instead of eating them, she would bring them over to me, or someone else, and say, "No." So she was anticipating the event.
The reward she received from that action was of more value to her then the reward she got from eating the stuff.
Well, she was and continues to be precocious, but I can assure you that REBELLION is not dead.
Never said it was, just that it does not manifest it's self at this stage. Rebellion or obedience are concepts that is a little to far advanced for the toddler to understand.
I have seen parent after parent try to "reason" with a toddler and all they do is confuse the child.
Toddlers live in a very simple and very self centered world. Adults need to accept that and deal with the child on that level rather then trying to give higher reasons for the things they do.
I have even seen them do it to babies, stating that their crying when there is "nothing wrong" is a sign of rebellion rather then doing the rational thing and saying that is is a sign they are uncomfortable.
In one case the parent begins to resent the child in the second seek to find out what is making the baby uncomfortable and change their environment.
There is plenty of time to deal with rebellion when they are older.
Our mom had five boys with an age-spread of 18 years, and although standing at a staggering 5'2” she had a smack that would bring tears to a 6'1”, 185lb., 16 y.o.’s eyes. lol Mom was the day-to-day warden and we all of dreaded the ol’ phrase....”wait till your dad gets home.”
I always have to laugh when I hear other people say that their dad also had the “look”. And here I thought that our dad invented that.
If you were foolish enough not to take dad's “look” seriously, you soon wouldn't forget not to do what it was that the “look” was supposed to stop.
Dad still let's the “look” fly every once and a while if a curse word slips out of our mouth at the dinner table; especially if the grand-kids are there. It doesn't matter that we now range from 31-49. lol
I am 0 for 10 on these moronic trends. My kids are capable, independent, and respectful. They follow traditional values, and they can explain why almost everything in tradition is a good idea on its own. I feel sorry for the children of liberals; following their values is almost as bad as the worst excesses in the other direction that anyone I knew encountered.
Treating ADD with drugs. Particularly hyper active boys.
It sounds like your methods were something that worked for you instead of you trying to stick to something you thought was antiestablishment. That is what I see with these women I was referring to - they think they are doing something revolutionary when instead the are just new age hippies - everything they are doing is a retread of the hippy generation, who turned into those currently retiring corporate types who realized money wasn’t the root of all evil.
Exactly.
I remember raising my kids in the late 60s and 70s.
Dr. Spock was the authority on all things having to do w/ kids.
Fortunately my wife and I ignored everything beyond his advice on physical ailments.
He was a big anti-Vietnam protester and was often in the forefront of anti-war marches.
Hey, Rhonda...
Why do you write about yourself in the third person on your profile page?
Are you royalty?
How pathetic. Any good parent disciplines his child, because he understands that the consequences that behavior will bring their child more heartache and pain down the road. That same parent is heartbroken when his child makes choices that he knows will bring him harm.
The parent you describe is abusive. The fact that you don’t seem to know the difference underscores the point of our post.
There you go again.
Are you royalty? A queen perhaps?
I always said "I'm going to count to 1". Worked like a charm.
Seriously? I share a by-line. I didn’t write the entire post- therefore it is our post. Wow. You are really just spoiling for a fight, not a discussion. Bug off. I have neither the time or the patience for this type of pettiness.
How about that third person profile page, Queenie?
I was an avid (over 10 years- big family) La Leche member- almost went into leadership. What stopped me? The group adhered a no-spanking/discipline line of thinking. The result- the most vicious bunch of toddler (most still nursing) that you could have imagined. They bit, hit through tantrums and all the mothers would do is give excuses for their children’s bad behavior. It got so bad the leaders and regular attendees where asked to only bring their infants BECAUSE THE CHILDREN WERE SCARING OFF THE NEW PEOPLE!
Sheesh.
Listening to Mr Spock, however, is completely logical.
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