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My marriage is certainly shaken by this turn of events. We modeled our marriage on the Gores. We often share awkward public extra-long rape-like kisses, and preach frugality and sustainability while consuming like an Arabic Sultan. I just don’t know if we’ll make it. These are indeed tough times for those of us that looked to the Gores for marital guidance.

Tell me about it. Our marriage went through a similar crisis when Roseanne Barr and Tom Arnold split up. It was like simultaneously having a rug pulled out from under me and being kicked in the chest. I was shaken to my very core, and forced to question everything I'd always believed. I still wonder how a loving God could allow such a thing to happen. I'll never forget where I was when I heard about it, just like 9/11 or the Challenger explosion... the tears, the anger, the denial, stumbling through the rest of the day in my shellshocked condition. Somehow we managed to pick up the pieces and go on, but it'll never be the same.