Posted on 02/23/2008 3:16:44 AM PST by bad company
An artist killed herself after aborting her twins when she was eight weeks pregnant, leaving a note saying: "I should never have had an abortion. I see now I would have been a good mum."
Emma Beck was found hanging at her home in Helston, Cornwall, on Feb 1 2007. She was declared dead early the following day - her 31st birthday.
Her suicide note read: "I told everyone I didn't want to do it, even at the hospital. I was frightened, now it is too late. I died when my babies died. I want to be with my babies: they need me, no-one else does."
The inquest at Truro City Hall heard that Miss Beck had split up with her boyfriend, referred to as "Ben" after he "reacted badly" to the pregnancy.
She saw her GP before the termination, but missed an appointment at a hospital in Penzance. She then cancelled, but later turned up to an appointment at a clinic at Royal Cornwall Hospital in Treliske. The counsellor was on holiday so a doctor referred Miss Beck to a pregnancy counselling telephone service eight days before carrying out the abortion when she was eight weeks pregnant, the inquest heard.
The coroner, Dr Emma Carlyon, ordered that the identities of the doctor who performed the abortion and her lead consultant be kept secret.
The inquest heard that Sylvia Beck, the victim's mother, wrote to the hospital after her daughter's death, saying: "I want to know why she was not given the opportunity to see a counsellor.
"She was only going ahead with the abortion because her boyfriend did not want the twins.
"I believe this is what led Emma to take her own life - she could not live with what she had done."
The doctor said: "I discussed Emma's situation with her, and wrote on the form, 'Unsupported, lives alone, ex-partner aware'.
"It is normal practice to give a woman the number for telephone counselling when a counsellor is not available.
"I am satisfied that everything was done to make sure that Emma consented to the operation.
She added: "We have since appointed more counsellors so there is more holiday cover."
Katie Gibbs, Miss Beck's GP, told the hearing: "She was extremely distressed by the abortion procedure, and I didn't think she ever came to terms with it.
"She had a long history of anxiety and depression. Despite my best efforts, she was not willing to see a counsellor after the termination."
Her boss at the clinic, said: "The time that can be given to a woman by a counsellor is limited in a busy hospital.
"I am satisfied everything was done to make sure Emma was consenting to surgery. I don't feel there was any gap in the counselling service.
"There were lots of individuals who would be alert to any doubts. The comments made by Emma's mother are not about a doctor I recognise."
Mrs Beck told the court: "Emma was considered a talented artist, and sold a number of paintings.
"She was pleased when she became pregnant, but Ben reacted badly to the news."
Recording a verdict of suicide, Dr Carlyon said: "It is clear that a termination can have a profound effect on a woman's life.
"But I am reassured by the evidence of the doctors here."
I suppose I experienced some of what your friend felt when he did nothing to try to prevent abortion. Mine was the inaction of a moral relativist who chose not to look beyond his own personal expediency. The choice to abort made life simpler for me at the time (Oh, how small my view of time was just then!) Some of what plagued me was my willingness to not think things through beyond my own selfishness. Time has given me the chance to reflect, realize, repent, and grow (somewhat) from all this.
I haven’t gone before any groups (wouldn’t even know how to contact these groups.) I do share with anyone who cares to listen when the topic comes up/the occasion calls for it. I have found that, like myself back then, the willingness to listen (to one’s own inner voice or the voice of another) determines whether a message will be received. Many (especially young people) are conditioned today to be self-sufficient, equipped with the same moral-relativism that I was possessed of back then.
As to experiencing God’s grace to move beyond remorse, He affords me that opportunity each and every moment (”Jesus loves me, this I know...”) When I live my life in the knowledge of His presence, I know I am forgiven. In fact, I become less, He becomes greater, so I see less of myself and more of Him. The enemy, of course, seeks to undo all that and, so, provokes my mind (my flesh) to dwell on the horrible nature of my sin and, in so doing, seeks to undo and confound the grace of Christ through things like guilt and remorse. When I let him (the enemy) do this, he has his tiny victory (he can have no ultimate victory though—”Lifted up was He to die, It is finished was His cry, Now in Heaven exalted high, Hallelujah! What a Savior!”
We dwell here (awaiting His return) freed from the penalty of sin, given grace to withstand the power of sin, but still in the presence of sin. One day, this will change also and we shall be united with Him totally freed from all that sin can plague us with. This woman’s sad story is a testimony not just to the horrible nature of abortion, but to the terribleness of sin (how it brings forth death!) Lives are ruined and destroyed. Sorrow, emptiness, guilt, remorse are its effects on the inner being of Man. The grave is its end.
“O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?
I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord.”
Heartbreaking. Prayers for this woman’s soul.
Many of the women we hear about on the news who kill their children have had abortions in their lives. Susan Smith is an example of that. She had at least one abortion prior to giving birth to her two boys. Although I don’t know this for a fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if the woman in Texas who drowned her children in the bathtub had had an abortion sometime in her life. What happens is that once a woman has an abortion, in order to alleviate the tremendous guilt they feel, they do not bond with future children, because if they did, they would then have to bond with the child they killed.
Also, the mindset sets in that if it’s OK to kill the child in the womb, then it must be OK to kill the children outside of the womb.
Many women who have unexplained mental illnesses may also be experiencing tremendous guilt over the killing of their unborn children. Margot Kidder, who played Lois Lane in the Superman movies, was found wandering incoherent in some field several years ago. She had suffered some sort of mental collapse. She was one of the women highlighted in a book in 1989 about movie stars who had abortions.
Again, I have no proof of this, but it wouldn’t surprise me to find out that Britney Spears had had one. She fits all the signs. The timing of her mental collapse seems to coincide with the birth of her children. Also, her actions are all centered around the children in some way.
I am not a psychologist, but my husband and I have done counselling of pregnant women contemplating abortions. Sometimes we were successful and sometimes we weren’t. One woman in particular working with us who had an abortion herself 19 years earlier one day had a complete emotional collapse and completely abandoned her 2 children she had years later. There is more of this that goes on than we will ever know. As soon as I hear of a woman going berserck and killing her children for no apparent reason, the first though that goes through my mind is I wonder if she ever had an abortion.
Very poignant song, given the thread. I remember when Clapton’s son died and the press (typically) looked for his reaction. The emptiness, the shatteredness that he exhibited was almost painful to see (as with any parent who has lost a child—what could be worse?)
In the OT story of David and Bathsheba, he ultimately repents of his sin of adultery and God reveals to him (through Nathan, the prophet) that he will be forgiven, but that the son born to them will die. David fasts and prays and grieves over this for several days, after which his on dies. When hearing of his son’s death, he stops grieving, cleans himself up. His men, curious about his reaction ask him about this and he responds,
“While the child was yet alive, I fasted and wept: for I said, Who can tell whether GOD will be gracious to me, that the child may live? But now he is dead, wherefore should I fast? can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.”
You write very eloquently of your journey to God. There are so many things you could do, but perhaps writing of your choices and regret is the way in which God will use you. You might even manage to pull some others, especially men, from the path to despair.
I pray for my relative, and urge him to trust in God’s mercy, but he refuses to believe God will forgive him. Until he embraces God’s mercy himself, there is little I can say or do, other than pray, to change his path.
I strongly recommend you contact Father Frank Pavone, of Priests for Life.
http://www.priestsforlife.org/
There are many people, and many groups, working in coordiantion with Priests for Life, to end abortion, and aid in assisting others who have walked your walk.
Pax et Bonum.
I truly believe it was the absolute act of penance. She is with God and her babies..or else there is no God.
sw
desperation Look up desperation at Dictionary.com
c.1366, from L. desperationem, noun of action from desperare “lose hope” (see despair). Desperate (adj.) is attested from 1483, of persons, “despairing, hopeless,” from L. desperatus “given up,” pp. of desperare. In ref. to conditions, recorded from 1555; of an undertaking, from 1642.
despicable Look up despicable at Dictionary.com
Failure to remain in faith in Christ by leaving the Hope He provides.
Great tagline!
Yup, I sure did misunderstand your post. I assumed
No problem
despair: to be without hope.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/despair
There are variations, of course, and its original meaning refers to a loss of hope in God and His mercy.
Wish there was some way to reverse the murder-suicide sequence.
Serious words to live by. To be sure.
“Artist hanged herself after aborting her twins”
So....murder AND suicide? Yep, she’s likely in hell.
She claimed they forced her?
For the men:
When a woman is pregnant, she is emotional, no matter how favorable her circumstances. If her circumstances are difficult, she will be prone to outside pressure. If she is not strong, and does not get support from people around her, she can succumb to pressure. If she is surrounded by people who pressure her to abort, she is vulnerable to that pressure.
May God have mercy on her soul.
I’ve been no saint but I have accepted Jesus Christ as my savior years ago and corrected my wayward ways.
Whether or not I go to heaven is in the hands of GOD and me at this point. I just have to keep trying to help others and live right.
think so eh?
Well, I stand by my assertion....
Cheers
Looking at how we, as a nation, now define Christian and Christianity, I would have to say that we, like Europe, Canada, and much of the rest of the world are now post Christian.
But that is only my conclusion from observation and reading, I would not care to argue the point.
Another liberal sees the light and can’t bear the truth. Had she only seen a little earlier three people would still be alive. Perhaps the lives would be a struggle but isn’t all life a struggle.
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