I have seen far too many families, where all the kids were given pretty much the same upbringing by the parents, yet the amount of rebellion ranged from almost non-existent to off-the-charts.
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KIDS DO NOT NEED THE ****SAME**** treatment. The NEED whatever that individual NEEDS.
I have NEVER observed a teen who as a 1-8 year old was bonded well with by an emotionally conencted balanced lovingly healthily affectionate father who grew up to be a rebellious teen. NEVER.
That would probably be over . . . a guesstimated 5,000 plus families I’ve had rather direct observations/info about.
I hate to intrude on this exchange, but I have seen what might be considered as black sheeps of the family. In a particular case, when junior high hit, the child completely changed....into a rebellious, mean spirited teen, who chose the wrong crowd to hang around, and at a 20+, still making self-destructive decisions. It's so sad, because the family did everything they could think of to help provide resources, and tons of choices to to that particular child...it didn't help her save her from herself. However, it's a choice the child is making. A lot of teens make poor choices..learn from them and grow out of it. Parents can only do so much, before they have to turn it all over to God, pray for the best for all...and attempt to feel peace..under the circumstances.
I like to refer to proverbs...the one that says, (paraphrased) train a child the way they should go, and when they are an adult, they will not stray from it. ( can't remember the exact verse.
Some kids choose to remain on the wrong path....and have to hit bottom numerous times before they get back on path..if ever.
proverbs: They will not depart from it, I think.