LOL!!! Hey QUIX!!!! It you can't get people to pay attention with ALL CAPS, maybe you should start adding LOTS OF EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!
Have you ever noticed that conspiracy theorists and snake-oil peddalers have a tendency to over-use them? Why do you suppose that is?
That overusing caps is considered shouting is not arbitrary as you claim. Both are intended to rise above the general chatter. If your words carry any real weight though, they aren't needed.
Use too many of 'em in a row & you could put somebunnys eye out!
Methiniks your construction on reality is not as air-tight as you seem to think it is.