You are a least correct in your assessment that you would not be considered a Christian, for you are not. You have created your own religion.
Read the Gospels and you will see that each has a different emphasis. Likewise with Chronicles and Kings.
Apparently not Noah and Enoch, whom God labeled "blameless" and are from the same bloodline as all supposed sinners
Blameless and sinless are two different things. Read Genesis 9 and we see good ol' Noah get drunk on the first fruits of his vineyard. Salvation has been the same throughout human history. Even under the Mosaic law, it was not the Law that saved the Israelites, it was faith.
No entity on Earth can be perfect in all things as the definition of "perfect"
True enough, but in Jesus and his sacrifice we have something and someone who is divine and, therefore, perfect.
No entity anywhere can be 200%
No, but it can be two things simultaneously. This is a divine mystery, like the trinity, but it is key to the Christian faith. Jesus had to be man to die for man's sins, but he had to be God to be perfect.
Irrelevant to his teachings, but I'll grant it
To the contrary, each of those elements was key to Jesus's life and mission. Being born of the virgin fulfilled a prophecy (Isaiah 7:14) and was part of His claim to being the Messiah, being Crucified dead fulfilled others (The Suffering Servant of Isaiah, Psalm 22, etc.), and being raised from the dead is key to Jesus's claim to being God (after all, how could God be bound by death?).
This view of salvation discards every moral and teaching that Jesus ever taught to his followers and disciples and renders all morality meaningless
It does nothing of the sort. I cannot even begin to guess how you reach this conclusion. If it is because you cannot work your way to heaven (i.e. it isn't "good" people who go to heaven) then that was postulated anyway. We deserve nothing less than eternal damnation and there is nothing we can do about it, in order to be freed of this second death we MUST accept Jesus's sacrifice. The result of this acceptance is that a man's heart is fundamentally changed so that he wishes to do good. A regenerate heart cannot do all the good it wishes and an unregenerate heart cannot do the evil it wishes.
“Jesus is 100% man and 100% God “
You know, this is one of the most interesting tenants, to me. If you (the royal you) believe that Jesus was a god or God, what was the point of his sacrifice? I mean, for a god or God to “die” on the cross would pretty much be meaningless — because he didn’t really die. A man could die, but not God. So according to this tenant, God did not sacrifice his only begotten son because his son was really a god too. Only if you believe that Jesus was human is there a sacrifice.