Posted on 09/10/2007 6:21:56 AM PDT by John Galt 72
Where Can Democrats Find a Speechwriter Like Osama bin Laden?
By Matt Carrothers
September 10, 2007
Has anybody here seen my old friend Osama? Can you tell me where he’s gone? Well, it appears from his latest video that Al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden is still squired away in a Pakistani cave somewhere, albeit a cave replete with enough sophisticated video recording equipment that he can beam talking points, err, a message of love and Allah to Democrats in the U.S. and Islamic terrorists around the world. Judging from his new, darker beard, Bin Laden also appears to have either procured a case of Grecian Formula or is sharing hair care tips with John Edwards.
The content of bin Laden’s latest videotaped screed proves that he is a master of timing and message control. His video was released just before the sixth anniversary of the September 11, 2001 Islamic terrorist attacks on the U.S. and General David Petraeus’ report to Congress on the progress of the troop surge. The Democratic presidential candidates have got to be jealous of this guy. Here they are, running all over the country, spending millions of campaign dollars raised by fugitive Norman Hsu. And for what? They’re lucky if their latest video blaming President Bush for the Appalachian State football team’s victory over Michigan receives a few hundred thousand web page hits. (The gall! Does Appalachian State even have a Womyn’s Studies major?)
Here are a few of the latest wimpy attempts by the rank rhetorical amateurs to show contempt for U.S. military personnel, hatred of America and secure support from liberal voters.
John Edwards, from a September 7 Associated Press article: “Today, terrorism is worse in Iraq, and it’s worse around the world. It means the results are in on George Bush’s so-called global war on terror and it’s not just a failure, it’s a double-edged failure.” Seriously, John, did your wife write that one for you?
Sen. Hillary Clinton, from her web site: “The war in Iraq has imposed a tremendous cost on our troops, their families and our budget. Four years after the start of the war, the violence continues to grow, and there is no end in sight.”
Sen. Barack Obama, from a September 6 Reuters report: “There is no military solution to Iraq’s civil war.”
Sen. Chuck Schumer, September 5, on the Senate floor: “Let me be clear. The violence in Anbar has gone down despite the surge, not because of the surge. The inability of American soldiers to protect these tribes from Al-Qaeda said to these tribes, ‘We have to fight Al-Qaeda ourselves.’ It wasn’t that the surge brought peace here. It was that the warlords took peace here, created a temporary peace here.” Your clarity is noted, Chuck. Your check from Mr. Hsu is in the mail.
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, from a September 6 Washington Times article: “The facts are self-evident that the progress is not being made. They might want to find one or two places where there has been progress but the plural of anecdote is not data.” That Nancy Pelosi – she’s a regular riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. Maybe it is true that only liberals read books.
And now, a few words from the master rhetorician, Al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden, on the liberal agenda: “It has now become clear to you and the entire world the impotence of the democratic system and how it plays with the interests of the peoples and their blood by sacrificing soldiers and populations to achieve the interests of the major corporations. And with that, it has become clear to all that they are the real tyrannical terrorists. In fact, the life of all of mankind is in danger because of the global warming resulting from a large degree from the emissions of the major corporations . . . ”
Referring to the prominent and influential positions held in the Bush Administration by Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld and Colin Powell, Osama bin Laden states, “So that was a clear signal that his administration – the administration of the generals – didn’t have as its main concern the serving of humanity, but rather, was interested in bringing about new massacres.”
Now that’s how you speak truth to power! The war itself demonstrates the foibles of democracy, the war causes global warming and bankrolls Big Corporate America, and Cheney, Rumsfeld and Powell wile away the weekends plotting new massacres. Well, duh! Obama, Clinton, Edwards and the rest of them would kill for a speechwriter this good. This guy bin Laden . . . he gets it!
These Democrats need to step up their game and start explaining to the American people how the Republican plan to fight global Islamic terrorism by trapping greenhouse gases in the atmosphere and flooding New Orleans was hatched in a Minneapolis airport bathroom stall by Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld and FOX News executives while they popped expensive pharmaceutical drugs by the bottle. While they’re at it, they should toughen up the image a little bit.
I wonder what John Edwards would look like with a beard?
© 2007 North Star Writers Group. May not be republished without permission.
“Where Can Democrats Find a Speechwriter Like Osama bin Laden?”
They’ve got at least a dozen, I’d say.
Give me a break; does anyone honestly believe that Hillary, Pelosi, Schumer, Reid, or any of the DC Liberal morons and RINOs cares one tiny bit about our military, our security, or our country??? These hypocrites only care about power, ego, and greed and, let’s not forget, staying in office as one of their top priorities regardless of the cost to the American people.
Wrong question.
They loaned him one of theirs.
I believe this makes alot of sense.
Can anyone elaborate on this?
Any college faculty member.
I thought Bin Laden’s speech sounded like it had been written by Dick Durbin’s speech writers. I thought it a keen trick on the Democrats part to help Bin Laden get his message out there.
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