you're exactly right about everything. I am an "only parent" (single mother) adopting a sibling set of four precious children this way, and I absolutely could not do it without the resources available to the children for medical care (medical, dental, psychological) through the state.
Grateful God has made a way for me to keep all four together. They are each a miracle.
My opinion, you don't need government help, ie, taxpayer's footing the bills, sorry. What works just fine is that you adopt what you can afford both time and financially. Whatever happened to the support of extended family, church and community to show how to live a proper and blessed life? Too many parents are adopting when they don't have time to be with these children and rely on government therapist to guide them.
I am saying this as a family member who has been through the process WITHOUT government support of any kind. My dear parents, my sisters and I made sure we as a family poured love to this child so that the abuse she had didn't affect the rest of her life. She's a happy mother in her 30's now.
God bless you for adopting those children. Being a single parent is very hard work, I'm sure, but those kids are blessed to have a parent devoted to them!
Just wanted to add - it seems like you are lucky to have these kids. I know I'm blessed to have mine!