not being catholic myself, i'm fairly ignorant of catholic laws. we made a compromise, the priest said "you're married" and signed the marriage license, so i believed him. in my Church (Assembly of God) that would have been accepted as being married.
The priest could also tell you you were the Pope, but it wouldn't make it true. As you had no intention of raising your children Catholic, he had no authority to marry you.
There are still some priests who offer Communion to politicians like John Kerry who are 100% pro-abortion. The Church's official policy on pro-abortion politicians is that they have excommunicated themselves. Priests who make their own rules are not speaking for the Church. You were never married to your wife in the eyes of the Catholic Church. On the plus side, your first wife was only guilty of fornication, not adultry.