Posted on 09/02/2006 7:54:32 PM PDT by too short
Eagle Bridge, NY August 3, 2006 W Ketchup announced today it has sent 4 bottles of delicious W Ketchup to the office of failed presidential candidate John Kerry. W Ketchup took this move in response to media reports that attendance at Kerrys last political rally in Iowa was sparse.
W Ketchups CEO Dan Oliver stated: We may not agree with Mr. Kerrys political views, but its sad when someone has a picnic and no one comes. We think if he had some delicious W Ketchup instead of some other brand, more people might enjoy his parties. We donated 4 bottles because we wanted to make sure that he would not run out on his next rally. We allocated 2 bottles for his supporters, and 2 bottles for the press. Unconfirmed reports suggest that Kerry chose to eat a candied apple rather than stomach the harsh, vinegary taste of W Ketchup's leading competitor.
W Ketchup was founded to give Americans a choice of ketchup, and a choice not to support Heinz, Teresa Heinz, and John Kerry. W Ketchup is made for Americans, and is sold only in America.
The only organization W Ketchup donates money to is the Freedom Alliance Scholarship Fund, which provides scholarships for the children of service members killed in the line of duty.
LOL that's cold.
Sad...
Kechup is best served cold.
I always liked catsup myself.
Saved for the day that I update my FR profile.....
Ketchup goes with everything!
IVE TASTED IT. ITS YUMMY !!!!!!
Is this satire? If it isn't, it's really pretty pathetic.
I have no problem killing a man in certain circumstances. But to embarrass a man.....well, I'm a coward in that regard. Nevertheless, this was humorous and it's a clever way to promote the product.
Forget Kerry, he's done.
This does zero damage ro a nonthreat and can only serve to perpetrate the hubris myth.
OK, let's take the ketchup and cover him with it! Since ketchup has so much importance to him
Hey...while I'm here...is there some secret way that I'm not aware of where one might edit one's submission after one screws up?
W Ketchup is excellent. I buy it by the case and give some away to please some people and aggravate others.
Ketchup goes great with a Fried Frenchy.
Where is Mama Ketchup?...Terrrrrraaaaaaaaaiiiizzzzzzaaaaa?
Where do you find W Ketchup?
Theresa went nuts 2 years ago ...we havent heard from her since
Somehow I think bottles of French's Yellow Mustard would have been more appropriate...
Del Monte is my choice!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.