Amen to that. I can only add to be patient while waiting for the meds to kick in, take only what is prescribed, and you may have to try some different ones before one or a combination is found that is right for you. You may have been self-medicating with alcohol so you didn't have to deeal with a depression/anxiety of longstanding.
Now one of the best things I was ever told was "Let yourself feel the feelings." We try to not have those bad feelings, but it is part of life, if you just accept the pain, it will abate eventually. If you try to medicate it away with booze, it really only makes it worse. The pain does not last forever, comes and goes, and everybody deals with it in one form or another.
When you are really depressed, it can only get so bad, you reach a point where it cannot get worse as to the way you feel. What you choose to do about the way you feel is up to you.
It's hard to focus on others when you feel that bad, so focus on yourself. Start rebuilding your life with healthy things you enjoy; healthy give and take friendships will build on that. Sometimes you just have nothing left to give emotionally, and it's time to take time out for yourself. Try not to inflict pain on others just because you feel bad and they are doing well.
And good luck to you.
I've heard from our Recovering FRiend:
Rob,
I treated myself (because I have Mondays off until after Labor Day) and slept in.
Indeed, it's a new day, and the notion of suicide was a silly, impulsive vanity that I have no intention of following: it is the ultimate act of LIBERALISM: me first, screw the loved ones. If nothing else, I'm one more useful vote against Democrats.
Now if I could just read my monitor without wiping my eyes every three minutes.
I can't believe the volume of responses, for one.
It's okay to tell everyone that every drug I'm on has been prescribed by both my primary doc (and you can name them, which is fine) and my neurologist (specifically, Zoloft, Librium [which I may have cut back on too soon, bringing on last night's catharsis], Keppra [anticonvulsant], and BuSpar.
Thus far, what's really hit home was BilltheDrill advising me that I'm only going through a physical change that is manifesting itself affectively/psychologically.
And, uh, the thousand or so prayers people have already sent [my way], and, uh, the forwarded FReepmails [you passed along to me].
God Bless, and my Prayers and thanks to you and all responders, including the hard-asses (yes, I need to be kicked in the rear-end, because I AM lucky, productive, and functional).
It's easier to pray out of thankfulness than to ask for His help (for instance, when I had the original nightsweat/insomnia a couple weeks ago, I thanked God for every half hour of sleep). It's the pride that is, indeed, eating at me, perhaps enabling the "disease" (a paradigm I'm still mentally debating), and, perhaps, if I can start physically feeling a little better, I can get [my big] Ego to finally command God to drop anchor and row the lifeboats to shore.
[You can post this, too - just please redact, just like this morning]
I owe you all. Big Time.
Your Recovering FRiend
**Now one of the best things I was ever told was "Let yourself feel the feelings." We try to not have those bad feelings, but it is part of life, if you just accept the pain, it will abate eventually.**
And I have heard it said that "Feelings are neither right nor wrong." It's what we do with the feelings that can be right or wrong.
Such as drifting into anger or depression.