Posted on 07/22/2006 6:03:00 PM PDT by NYer
As you probably have noticed, I'm not shy in telling people how I feel. I'm seriously considering taking him aside and saying something. My husband doesn't want me to. I feel so sorry for the woman, but she's obviously come to terms with it...I don't know. It makes me sad. In my wildest imagination, I could never imagine being married to a man who would insult and hurt me so much in front of other people.
Those parents need to read "How To Train Up A Child" by M. Pearl.
Please note that I did not suggest that others do what I did.
I think you should invest in some psychoanalysis to see why you habitually CHOOSE crazy women to be with.
My wife knows her place...she runs everything including me!
That is a good one! You will be having a great time at 90 until the gun goes off, but you gotta go some way and heck I have heard of worse ways of going. I hope he at least waits until you are done. lol.
Re your post 144, you (like "television is just wrong") touched on yet another one of my reasons for not having children. I grew up in a family similar I think to the one you were subjected to. It was a day-to-day hell.
Sometimes it's just ...I don't know what to call it, but a kind of humor or private joke between them. They really aren't putting each other down but playing. Other times it is just meanness. You are right though. Women should be respectful (maybe not the best choice of word) to their husbands also. You have to go back to where was this behavior learned though. Little kids learn by example at home.
Just that people that choose to remain childless should not expect people who disagree with that choice to pat them on the back and tell them it's fine.
In the case I described, it's just meanness. She has confided in me that it's been a problem their whole marriage....actually breaking them up for awhile. (their in there mid 50's.) That's what makes it even more uncomfortable for all around. She always looks like she's going to cry...and I think he enjoys hurting her. It's making my husband not like him either. Individually, they're terrific...but together??? Sigh....
Why would anyone care if I have children or not? I'm serious. That's why I suspect there is deep resentment and envy for people who don't have children. I don't go around telling people they're wrong for having kids, why would anyone go out of their way to scold me for not having any?
That's sad.
Who's scolding you?
No one cares whether or not you, personally, have children. :-)
I was speaking to Linda_22003, I courtesy-pinged you because you were the subject of the exchange.
yes, it is.
Honestly, I can't imagine life without them and now that they are adults (23 and 24 years old), we find them to be the kind of people we want to be around.
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Are they adulst? If so you are truly blessed, I see a lot of thirty year old children these days.
I have no kids, but I do not think of it as an 'inadequacy.' Sirloin, I think you are too hard on yourself.
1. I'm a full time college teacher, 80 hours a week, and it's a big job in my view, to help really screwed-up immature high school & college kids develop some character and personal responsibility. I clean up what the parents, many of them with a few divorces under their belts, have done (or not done) for their children. If (my husband &) I had kids, it would be extremely time consuming to do well - and I could not help make a big dent in the problems of delinquency and irresponsibility I help to correct every year with hundredss of young people in their teens and twenties. So, I'm very happy with my decision. Much happier, than if I'd had 1 or 2 children. You can't do everything well (have kids, and work full time). You must make choices.
2. We have 6.5 Billion people on the planet and with that has come stressed economic resources, crowded schools, housing shortages. I think we have an implicit "no vacancy" sign out at the moment -- population growth is a serious matter which we should all think about seriously.
Those WITH kids, especially with more than 1 or 2, could be viewed as the "selfish ones" in this light. Just a few more kids REALLY puts demand pressure on housing, living costs, and etc. in any community. "Thanks," for that...
Unfortunately, we are all gonna die of something. I think we should enjoy life while we have it. We never know when our time is up.
It's funny, I have a story that's quite similar.
The next door neighbors of the house where I grew up were a childless couple. They both had their own careers, and they decided that they would rather each pursue their careers than have children.
Many years later, he died of cancer, and she was all alone. She lived all alone in that house for a few years until she got sick herself. As she was dying in the hospital, some people who identified themselves as her "cousins", showed up from across the country in an RV and started living in her house for about a week or so. My mother could never prove it, but she strongly suspected that they were pilfering her house of valuables.
On a brighter note; our neighbor and her husband were both atheists. On her deathbed, she converted to Catholicism. Her last request to my mother before she died was to get a statue of Our Lady and place it in her backyard.
I agree with you about society at large. However, when you see your children, stand up against the selfishness of the world, it is truly a site to behold!
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