Posted on 06/29/2006 8:59:40 AM PDT by charming_harmonica
A 5-month-old baby died in a minivan Wednesday after the mother apparently forgot to drop the child off at day care.
The tragedy was discovered about 5:30 p.m. outside the Wonder Years 2 day care. The baby's mother stopped at the day care after work to pick up the child and was told by staff that the baby had not been dropped off. She realized then that the baby had been in her minivan all day.
"The mother had forgotten to drop off the child at day care in the morning," said Curt Kreun, owner of Wonder Years 2. "She actually came in the building to pick up the child and then realized what had happened."
The child was in a car seat in the back of the vehicle, according to Sgt. Jeff Burgess of the Grand Forks Police Department. A Wonder Years 2 staff member made the 911 call, according to Kreun.
Staff members had taken the baby out of the van and started CPR before the ambulance arrived. Kreun said he reached the scene about 6 p.m. and emergency personnel already had gotten the word from Altru to cease resuscitation.
"The child had probably passed away a while before she got to the day care," Kreun said.
Kreun, who has been in the child care business for years, said near-tragedies happen all too often.
"I know people who have gotten to work and realized they forgot to drop off their kids and had to go back."
Kreun said it would have been impossible for passersby to see the baby in the van, which had tinted windows.
"I walked around that van about 14 times after they left, and you would not have been able to see in there," he said.
The incident is under investigation by the Criminal Investigation Bureau, but police told Kreun they didn't expect charges to be filed.
"They're looking at it as a tragic accident," he said. "This is by far the most devastating thing I've had to witness."
"There are no arrests being made tonight," said Burgess. "I can tell you that."
The cause of death had not yet been confirmed Wednesday night, but a likely cause of death in cases where children are left in hot vehicles is hyperthermia.
The temperature in a parked car rises very rapidly, even when the windows are left open a crack. Studies show that the temperature can rise as much as 50 degrees in an hour.
Wednesday's high was 79 degrees, so the temperature in the van easily could have exceeded 100 degrees.
She should have had her baby on her mind until she carried the baby into the day care and spoke to the person to whom she was entrusting her precious child.
"Just FYI, just because we work doesn't mean raising and caring for our kids isn't our first priority.
Such black and white judgements are rarely accurate."
What's wrong with you. Everybody knows that every aspect of raising kids is all black and white. Just follow the right formula and, bingo, perfect children every single time.
I agree with almost everything you said, but would contend that the contumely FReepers heap on this poor woman does serve a social purpose.
Deep down, we all realize that there but for the grace of God go we. By directing disgust and outrage at this woman--who is unlikely ever to read this thread, so no real harm done--FReepers are in actuality scolding themselves and each other, driving home the lesson that such negligence can never be pardoned or excused...by one's own self. The woman is a surrogate for their own, negligent selves who accidentally roast their beloved children to death in some possible future. They repudiate that self, and morally reject that future, partly because it might help to prevent it from coming to pass. Such self-flagellation helps them to remember the lesson.
I myself reinforce the lesson by forcing myself to read these stories, even though they stab at my heart. What could be worse than that guilt?
But for the grace of g-d, that could have been any parent I know
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That gives me chills. How many otherwise normal people are driving around not knowing where their small children are?
That's Alouette. I only had one. I'm thoroughly absent-minded. I've lost cars in parking lots, but never with a child in them. Had I had nine children, I may not have had any mind left, but I doubt they would have been neglected. I once left in the middle of a business luncheon because I didn't feel comfortable with the child care situation where I had left my toddler. And once in the middle of a busy day at work, I had a vision of my child being left alone at the bus stop. Turns out that her care-giver had forgotten to come get her. I was troubled by the vision, couldn't get ahold of them, so just prayed for her safety. So I couldn't even get her out of my mind when she was out of sight. I think this is a very strange story.
You ARE kidding aren't you?
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How do you explain that she did not know that she had a dead baby in the back seat of her Hot car when she got in to it at the end of her work day?
"So you think that the single mom should receive welfare and stay home?"
Not at all. Welfare is a trap for the weak and lazy and a last resort for those unable to work (which are very few). We have not established that the mother in question was single, a widow, or married. IMO new mothers should stay at home with their kid until school age unless they HAVE to work. I don't mean have to work because they want a bigger house or a fancier car, or to go on nicer vacations. These are the reasons most new mothers with husbands work. Having to work means it is necessary to feed the family and keep a decent roof over their head. In any case I stand by my comment that a good mother doesn't forget her kid in the back of a car for an entire freaking day.
I don't agree with you. I was far from a perfect parent. One of my fears is that I would get deep into a conversation and allow my daughter to wander into traffic or drown in a pool. I cannot do two things at once and if I begin to talk, I'm totally focused on that. It's a huge problem. And it would have been my fault. But I just don't get this one. To put a child into the car seat and not take her to child care and then work all day without thinking about it is over the line of possibility. Not because I think I'm perfect--I've lived without myself way to long to think that. But this just doesn't pass the smell test.
"How do you explain that she did not know that she had a dead baby in the back seat of her Hot car when she got in to it at the end of her work day?"
I'm not in this woman's brain, but I'm sure she didn't look in back because she didn't expect the baby to be there. And the seat would have been turned around backwards because of the infant's age, which would tend to hide it.
I have no understanding on how something like this could happen. How do you forget a child? What on earth could that mother been thinking on so hard, that she forgot her baby?
I'd like to think that should I be blessed with children, I'd never have something on my mind so strong as to forget my child was riding in the car with me.
Like one of the other posters said, you got the child to the vehicle......
(sigh) Prayers for the newest resident of Heaven.
Several devices are either already on the market or being introduced that are more sophisticated and actually detect a human (or animal) presence and use an alarm protocol.
It's only a sign of the times that we feel we need to do such.
The empty carseat weighs more than that, doesn't it?
"So all those 3rd generation welfare moms are square with you while all us good-for-nothin' working moms are worthless - interesting. I guess I should have given my kids up for adoption so they could have a stay-at-home mom who hopefully wouldn't molest, abuse and/or starve them. "
Interesting that you equate stay at home mothers with welfare queens, and women who molest, abuse and starve children. And you seem to be defending this mother whose neglect killed her kid.
Have you ever forgetten your kid in a car for an hour? How about for an entire day? How many work days go by where you don't think about your kids at least once or twice? IMO a woman who appears to be only fleetingly interested in her kids and who can't be bothered to stay home and raise them is not a good mother.
Or, we could just get rid of the federally-mandated exploding airbags, so the kids could ride in the front seat where they belong (where the driver can see and reach them).
This is devastating. That woman will be in her own personal prison for the rest of her life. Jail would be a break, considering what she will endure. God help her. God help her.
There was a family in our church in which the father did this...he was stressed out, had a big meeting that day at work...Not that that is any excuse at all. He is still in hell 6 years later. The family didn't survive it, divorce etc...Horrible for the child, no peace for the parent.
That's actually a very smart idea. You should consider developing it further in some way.
Damned Ambien. /s
It is easier for me to imagine a father doing this than a mother. Not that their love is any less, but they're just not wired with maternal love the same way. Good thing, too. We need both mothers and fathers. But a mother I just don't understand. I can understand that a marriage wouldn't survive such an ordeal, although it's very sad. I hope both this mom and dad can find peace...
I apologize for persisting in discussing this tragedy. It was just such a useless waste of life that makes me angry. Perhaps we need a Government Ad to run on all radio stations regularly - "Do you know where your baby is" to bring the gravity of this sort of situation home to new parents. I can understand how a person, especially a tired working mother of a five-month old, getting ready for work, getting her baby ready for daycare, driving to work while thinking of her day's duties, and by-passing the stop at day care.
Obviously, our hearts go out to her and the baby's father.
Since so many on this thread have accepted the inevitibility of this type of occurence, I think more publicity needs to be given to the possibility, so that new parents get into the habit of thinking about their baby first every time they are driving.
Some folks clearly don't need the grace of g-d, they're perfect in their own right.
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