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Child guru says nurseries harm small children
The Sunday Times ^
| February 12, 2006
| Sian Griffiths
Posted on 02/12/2006 9:10:43 AM PST by tbird5
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To: narby
To: Ninian Dryhope
"No one seems to ask what a single mom is supposed to do?" That is easy. Don't be a single mom. Ditto. Furthermore, there is no such thing as single mom. Either they are widowed, divorced or unwed. Politically correct speech = single mom.
To: Ninian Dryhope
It's better avoid getting into an unhappy and volatile marriage in the first place. Wow. What amazing real-world advice you provide!
143
posted on
02/12/2006 12:55:07 PM PST
by
Ramius
(Buy blades for war fighters: freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net --> 1000 knives and counting!)
To: Trout-Mouth
What does it matter ~how~ they are single?
Isn't the end result the same?
144
posted on
02/12/2006 12:55:43 PM PST
by
RMDupree
(HHD: Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/)
To: Ramius
~snicker~
I'm overwhelmed by his superior wisdom!
145
posted on
02/12/2006 12:59:20 PM PST
by
RMDupree
(HHD: Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/)
Comment #146 Removed by Moderator
To: wolf24
ROTFLMAO!
Most excellent, wolf!
147
posted on
02/12/2006 1:09:12 PM PST
by
RMDupree
(HHD: Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/)
To: Popman
To: dinoparty
You know, Dinoparty, I hear this a lot and I am going to make a comment that I hope you will not take as criticism, but rather a perspective born of time and experience.
I stayed home with my children until they were both in school. (Now I get home when they do.) Staying home with them is the single most difficult thing I have ever done. I am not a baby person, or a "little kid" person by nature. It was exhausting, isolating, sometimes otherworldly. I got stir crazy and sometimes looked at my days and longed for a time when "I got something accomplished" in an organized and linear way. I got lonely sometimes. I missed adult interaction, the opportunity to "speak in complete adult sentences." I did volunteer work and ran a business from my home at night...did I mention I was exhausted? My husband was exhausted as well. He sometimes felt lonely and on the outside looking in. He missed what we had before the kids came a long. He worked long, difficult hours and still made time for the family. It was HARD, HARD work.
We were also "poor" in material things. It was rugged financially. There were days when we paid for the necessities out of the change we could find in the sofa cushions. Made deals with the electric company or the water providers to "can you wait one more week before you turn it off." Fortunately, we have a generous extended family who gave us enormous support, but they are not rich either, so it's not like "daddy paid our way." But I don't want to minimize the enormity of their contribution, because I feel so much gratitude.
The point is this: it was a VERY small part of the total of my life. It was only 10 years. TEN years. With God's grace, perhaps 1/8th of my life. Ten years of sacrifice of "how I feel" or "what I want" for a lifetime of success and happiness and health of my children. While at the time it seemed huge and never ending, it seems like so little and so short now. I remember it with such love and affection. I miss it in theory, although probably not so much in actuality.
We are fortunate to have children who, while not perfect by any measure, are polite, thoughtful, empathetic and not prone to peer pressure. Those are difficult character traits to develop in daycare or nursery school.
My husband and I KNOW them as well as any other human being on earth. We know their weaknesses and their strengths. We've learned to face and accept our own weakness and strengths and work to make progress.
Most of all, we've come to understand that our children are our greatest task, and our only lasting contribution to this world. I want to know, even if things do not turn out the way I hope and pray, that I did everything in my power to make that legacy something that makes the world a better place for YOUR children, as well as my own.
So, I'm going to disagree with you and say that you are denying yourself the greatest opportunity in life. You are making an excuse. Nothing harms a child more, than believing that his parents "feelings" and "comfort" are more important than his well being. I realize it is harsh. But I don't say that because of some sort of cold perfectionist driven ideal. I say it because I want you to know that satisfaction may not be what you feel while you are going through something, but what you feel when the task is completed.
I wish you every success, and all the happiness in the world. And your son as well.
To: dinoparty
"LOL, you haven't met my smiling boy."
Don't want to either!
"Baby prison" is cruel.
150
posted on
02/12/2006 1:26:33 PM PST
by
nmh
(Intelligent people believe in Intelligent Design (God))
To: RMDupree
What does it matter ~how~ they are single? Isn't the end result the same? yea, yea, everything has to be through rose-colored glasses today because we can't take responsibility for our situation.
To: Trout-Mouth
There is absolutely nothing rose-colored about being a single parent. Regardless of how it happened.
And I have taken responsibility for my situation by working hard and making sacrifices.
I certainly do not need or would ever want any type of help from someone as condescending as you.
There are much better people out there who don't sit upon their pedestal pooh-poohing the troubles of others by saying they've brought it upon themselves.
152
posted on
02/12/2006 1:38:50 PM PST
by
RMDupree
(HHD: Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/)
To: RMDupree
Makes no difference to me what the situation is. Acceptance of liberal politically correct speech such as single mom to describe a divorcee, a widowed woman or an unwed mother is condesending and ignores by sidestepping the facts.
To: Trout-Mouth
But you have yet to explain how it makes any difference.
Is a woman ~less~ of a single mother by being a divorcee rather than a widow?
Is an unwed mother solely to blame for her situation?
154
posted on
02/12/2006 1:56:18 PM PST
by
RMDupree
(HHD: Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/)
To: redheadtoo
What I said was true. If you are saying that there might be other policies with the same goal, that is something different.
To: RMDupree
But you have yet to explain how it makes any difference. Is a woman ~less~ of a single mother by being a divorcee rather than a widow? Is an unwed mother solely to blame for her situation? Liberal thought = politically correct speech = difference between liberal and conservative and expectations. What are you so offended by and ticks you off about honestly addressing the facts? Political speech is done for a purpose--excuses.
To: tbird5
Day care centers were very popular in Mother Russia when it was the USSR. Our vast left wing group foisted the day care on an unsuspecting population of women working outside their homes as a great idea. Day care center availability and high taxes have American women working outside the home in record numbers, plus the left's constant publishing of "working women", as opposed to mothers who keep a happy home for children and husband.
157
posted on
02/12/2006 2:09:39 PM PST
by
tillacum
(Today is the beginning of the rest of your life, take advantage of it, don't waste it.)
To: Trout-Mouth
Again, you go round and round by saying that the term "single mother" is an example of political correctness.
Let's try it again:
The question is whether a woman is ~less~ of a single parent depending on how she got there?
And if placing the child in day care while she works to support that child an indication that she is a bad parent?
158
posted on
02/12/2006 2:13:45 PM PST
by
RMDupree
(HHD: Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/)
To: nmh
Mind if I incorporate that in my description of them. As long as you sign the limited license agreement? Just kidding. Go right ahead.
The similarities really are striking between the two: Prisons and daycare centers.
159
posted on
02/12/2006 2:17:44 PM PST
by
Popman
("What I was doing wasn't living, it was dying. I really think God had better plans for me.")
To: tbird5
instead of subsidising nurseries, which do a second-rate job, the government should put in place policies to enable mothers to stay at home with their babies.Or better yet, cut Mom & Dad's taxes so that both don't have to work.
160
posted on
02/12/2006 2:20:12 PM PST
by
T. Buzzard Trueblood
(left unchecked, Saddam Hussein...will keep trying to develop nuclear weapons." Sen. Hillary Clinton)
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