Posted on 01/08/2006 2:24:03 PM PST by Lorianne
It is 25 years since Terry Hekker hailed the housewife, now in a landmark decision the acclaimed author has rejected her past saying she was wrong
Terry Hekker wrote a book in 1980 that made her famous. Ever Since Adam & Eve was a passionate defence of her decision to eschew a career and spend her life as a wife and a mother.
Coming at the end of the Seventies, when feminism was enjoying a renaissance and the career woman was emerging from behind the cooker, Hekker became a celebrated poster child for more old-fashioned values. She wanted her job choice of 'homemaker' to be considered as valid as those of up-and-coming women bankers, bosses and company directors.
Today, Hekker told The Observer, she is planning a follow-up book. Its working, albeit jokey, title is bluntly honest: Disregard First Book. For her life did not turn out as she planned, and she now believes her decision to become a housewife and homemaker should serve as a warning for young American women. 'My anachronistic book was written while I was in a successful marriage that I expected would go on forever. Sadly, it now has little relevance for modern women, except perhaps as a cautionary tale,' Hekker wrote last week as she announced her U-turn.
In a display of spectacular bad taste, Hekker's husband presented her with divorce papers on their 40th wedding anniversary and left her for a younger woman. The divorce left her facing an uncertain financial future, bereft of income and - after spending her adult life bringing up five children - lacking skills to make her attractive in the job market. Despite that, the judge in her divorce case suggested that - at 67 - she go for job training.
(Excerpt) Read more at guardian.co.uk ...
I agree...but apparently the court didn't.
"She did not 'burn her bra' and then ask for support. She had a lifetime contract with another person who now wants to renege".
Life would be much easier if you would learn to discern the male sense of humor. This is why I am almost always flamed by women on FR.
IT IS A JOKE !!! (and a pretty funny one, at that.)
"WOMEN ARE EEEEEEEEVIL ON Freerepublic, and why I don't give a dime to this place, and keep waiting to get kicked off for saying so. I cannot imagine a more loathesome place to attract moderate female voters. Actually, I'm a conservative Christian, and this place wouldn't have attracted me to conservatism if I wasn't already a conservative."
So what are you saying? We men are evil, despicable, self absorbed, juveniles who think women are HUMORLESS, evil, self absorbed, and petty?
Ok. So what's your point?
Duh. You're right.
Hairofthedog, I apologize for not recognizing the obvious. Good one.
Thank you Farnham.
(note to self: do not drink wine when on FR or ebay.)
How very gracious of you. (no sarcasm present)
Thanks
yep[....all was well when she was married. Then hubby left and now it's everyone elses fault. Poor her.
yep[....all was well when she was married. Then hubby left and now it's everyone elses fault. Poor her.
That may be true but write a book about it??????????????
In a marriage, there is nothing wrong with having the wife stay home to cook, clean and raise the kids. (In fact, the husband can assume this role as well.) But there should always be a fallback plan in case tragedy strikes. This can be in the form of accumulated wealth or in the form of a marketable job that the stay-at-home spouse can perform if need be. I believe that it is not a good thing for one spouse to be totally dependent upon the other's income for financial support.
My wife and I both have insurance taken out on the other so that if one of us dies, there will be enough money to pay off the mortgage and enable either of us to easily sustain the household standard of living on one income.
Should've put that money from the first book aside for hard times.
I don't devine and Karnack I'm not. Since no one else on here does either, I'm taking the story as is. You sound like you're taking the other side without even hearing it. You seem be more second guessing than I am. At least I'm going by what's written.
Tagline: (Fix the problem, not the blame!)
How does your tagline mesh with your post?
Most people don't have the luxury of saving all our earnings for some future date years from now, we need it to live today.
It's remarkable, isn't it?
These threads usually have a lot of 'femimist' bashing. Which is a lot of bull.
Face facts. In 1960 men learned that with modern appliances they didn't need a wife to have clean clothes, hot meals, and a clean place. That made the economic value of a wife's labor practically worthless. Which, of course, left men with far less incentive to marry or stay married.
The early 70's with the advent of No Fault Divorce were full of horror stories just like this. Middle aged women being dumped for younger wives, or by men who just wanted to sample the Sexual Revolution, and now being expected to support themselves without marketable job skills. THAT made feminism inevitable and necessary.
Betty Friedan did not destroy marriage. The vaccuum cleaner and frozen foods did.
This thread has been interesting. One can see the life experiences of posters or perhaps their close associates reflected in many of the postings. I am male, and have been married twice. I have compassion for the female who devotes her married life to raising kids, and then ends up divorced, regardless of who was at fault. I think the biggest problem is people marry too young, before they have a clue, and end up with someone that, in reality, they are not compatible with.
Not to mention half his pension.....
Sounds like her husband is a real creep.
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