Posted on 01/08/2006 2:24:03 PM PST by Lorianne
It is 25 years since Terry Hekker hailed the housewife, now in a landmark decision the acclaimed author has rejected her past saying she was wrong
Terry Hekker wrote a book in 1980 that made her famous. Ever Since Adam & Eve was a passionate defence of her decision to eschew a career and spend her life as a wife and a mother.
Coming at the end of the Seventies, when feminism was enjoying a renaissance and the career woman was emerging from behind the cooker, Hekker became a celebrated poster child for more old-fashioned values. She wanted her job choice of 'homemaker' to be considered as valid as those of up-and-coming women bankers, bosses and company directors.
Today, Hekker told The Observer, she is planning a follow-up book. Its working, albeit jokey, title is bluntly honest: Disregard First Book. For her life did not turn out as she planned, and she now believes her decision to become a housewife and homemaker should serve as a warning for young American women. 'My anachronistic book was written while I was in a successful marriage that I expected would go on forever. Sadly, it now has little relevance for modern women, except perhaps as a cautionary tale,' Hekker wrote last week as she announced her U-turn.
In a display of spectacular bad taste, Hekker's husband presented her with divorce papers on their 40th wedding anniversary and left her for a younger woman. The divorce left her facing an uncertain financial future, bereft of income and - after spending her adult life bringing up five children - lacking skills to make her attractive in the job market. Despite that, the judge in her divorce case suggested that - at 67 - she go for job training.
(Excerpt) Read more at guardian.co.uk ...
I guess raising and educating the future generation is not a very valuable pursuit. Unfortunately, economics suggest you are wrong. The housewife is an impact on not only her children's future productivity, but her husbands earnings. Our society will only impoverish itself if it discourages future productivity.
The sad thing is she is now taking the side of the group that put her in this position. Any rational law would recognize the situation and ensure the husband supported her for the rest of her life.
I doubt it- I know many companies thaty force people to retire at 65. It's different for everyone.
Not true. I've seen plenty of cases were the wife gets next to nothing because of no-fault laws.
I think we'd all be surprised how often personal tragedy (like in this example) or personal failure fuels a total political worldview.
And if, if fact, the court doesn't provide for ample alimony, then she's right in that young women would be wise to keep up with their careers, and not chuck it all to raise the kids.
How many companies will hire a 67 year old (other than Walmart)?
How many people can just pick themselves up and start a successful business at 67 years old?
She did once write a book and get it published. So she can't be completely like "you want fries with that"
I'd like to know how many of the FReepers who like to say "get a job, you lazy idiot!" on these threads would actually offer to help out another unemployed, fiftysomething FReeper?
That poor lady. If more of us acted like men should there would be no feminism.
Lawyers usually won't let the party cite divorce anymore.
Lawyers usually won't let the party cite adultery anymore.
The first step is a massive change in presumptions in that gender roles are not interchangable.
She shouldn't have to get a job. After being married for 40 years she should get at least half of her husband's assets and conitued earnings, since he ended the marriage.
Interesting. No feminist here but raising my three daughters toward professional careers. I want marriage, kids, the works for them but never want them to be dependent upon their husbands for existence.
I've always been of the position that it's perfectly fine to know how to be a good wife and homemaker as long as a woman also has the skills, talents, knowledge and resources to provide for herself and her family if something horrible or unexpected happens to her husband or if her husband does something horrible to her.
Excellent post.
I agree ... only they are not HIS assets, they are THEIR assets.
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