Posted on 11/18/2005 5:17:59 PM PST by Cagey
LEE'S SUMMIT, Mo. -- A Missouri fisherman is accused of cheating in a professional bass tournament.
Paul Tormanen, 39, of Lee's Summit, faces a felony charge of contest fraud. He's suspected of catching bass before the competition and tying them to a stump, then submitting them during a competition in Louisiana last week, reported KMBC-TV in Kansas City, Mo.
Another competitor found tethered bass and informed authorities, who marked the fish, the television station reported. Tormanen was then questioned when he allegedly turned one of the marked fish in to be weighed at the Bassmaster Tournament on the Red River.
Fisherman who know Tormanen are shocked by the accusation.
"I just talked to him a couple weeks ago and personally congratulated him on such a successful season last year," pro bass fisherman Shane Voyles said. "He won, you know, $40,000, $50,000, $60,000 last year just in the Heartland ProAm circuit -- that's a local circuit around here."
"It's a sad thing ... I get phone calls from friends, 'Man, can you believe this?' We all knew the guy," he said.
Voyles has won a big bass tournament himself, which included a $51,000 prize and a trophy. He's also a spokesman for Xtreme Marine in Lee's Summit, and he said Tormanen's fraud charge has him worried about sponsorships.
"It could hurt those of us out there that are trying to raise revenue to help pay for our sponsorship. I mean, they're going to look at this and say, 'Wait a second here, is this a cheating sport?'" Voyles said.
Tormanen has posted bond and was released.
KMBC went to the address listed on Tormanen's arrest record and found the front door ajar. A sign on the door read, "Welcome Home Dad, We Miss You." When KMBC rang the bell, someone slammed the door shut.
Whale, supper's done and they liked it a lox. Mr. HR said I did a fin job of cooking.
Fishermen are good liers.... Fact!
At a contest for halibut up in Homer Alaska, when they picked up one of the halibut to weigh it (tail first), rocks fell out of it's mouth. Oops...
The whole grouper just salmon them?
Here's another story for you.
I used to live on a lake in Florida that was famous for bass fishing. There were many contests on this lake.
These bass fisherman buy these 3000 horsepower boats so they can get from secret spot A to secret spot B as quickly as possible.
One day I saw one of these boats flying by at full throttle trying to get to his next spot. You could almost see him daydreaming about what he's going to catch next.
His big problem was that when he departed point A he forgot to pull into the boat his stringer with many fish on it. As he flew by about 40mph, the stringer was bouncing all over the water and his fish were flying off left and right. I wish I could have seen his face when he discovered his error.
If it wasn't all of them, what would be the porpoise?
I had an a-ray of issues to deal with -- including a major perch-ase, but now I'm back in the swim. To tell you the truth, I'm tired enough to conch out.
He looks so earnest.
So I saw cast my line over by the stump. Something took a bite on it. So I started trying to reel it in. Thats when I concluded my line was stuck. So I drifted over to free the line and thats when I noticed I'd caught a fish that some weirdo had tied to a stump. I untied it and reeled it in.
This is by far the stragest catch I've ever made.
Now as it turns out it was tied there by one of my competitors in cahoots with the show judges.
I was setup your honor.
I'll be home for lefse...
Freeper FreePun' Ping List PING! These guys are taking this topic to SCHOOL! Y'all had better get over here before they're all snappered up--what I'm saying is, you octopus it in high gear. The only way they'll clam up is if all the puns are gone. So cobia trouper, and don't let them carp about how the folks on this list are a buncha sleepers, by garsh!
I shore-ly didn't have time to moss around last night, trolling the banks as I was casting about on a vey series thread. Now, I'll dip my net in the other side, if you'll just stop carping!
But a thought about that Iraq vote: although the Democrats did a lot of tailwalking, in the end they turned out to be a bunch of squids and spineless jellyfish, without a dogfish in the Iraq fight.
That's a whale of a pun, LIB. Loaded to the gills. Cod you save some for the rest of us? Since you didn't leave much, I'll have to post my favorite fish story:
A man was stopped by a game-warden in Montana with two buckets of still-alive fish leaving a lake well known for its fishing. The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish? If not, you're in big trouble."
The man replied to the game warden, "No, sir. These are my pet fish."
"Pet fish?!" the warden asked.
"Yes, sir. Every night I take these here fish
down to the lake and let them swim around for a while. I whistle and they jump back into their buckets, and I take em home."
"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!"
The man looked at the game warden for a moment, and then said, "Here, I'll show you. It really works."
"O.K. I've GOT to see this!." The game warden was curious now.
The man poured the fish in to the lake and stood and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to the man and said, "Well ?"
"Well, What?" the man responded.
"When are you going to call them back?" The game warden prompted.
"Call who back?" The man asked.
"The fish." replied the warden.
"What fish?" The man asked.
Glad to see you guys mussle in here with a few more puns; I was perched on the edge of my seat waiting for your contributions. Nobody needs to be a brain sturgeon to take part in this. Walleye better be going now.
I've gotta come clean (and fillet), porpoisely avoiding this thread last night was totally shellfish, I was conched in sole-itude and now realize that's abalone. I'm not a king salmon, I'm more a grouper.
Worm it not for fatigue, I'd have joined you earlier. My brain was fried, so I haddock to clam up, I was unable to spawn any puns to post here for free, much less elswhere for diner-roe.
But walleye was away from this thread, my chums circled the boat around me and pinged out lip-smackeral tasty tidbits and so I figured I'd fish and chips in.
YOU SAID THAT FOR THE HALIBUT.
I think we're just about fin-ished now.
Really, I'm shocked, shocked, I say, that a fisherman would tell lies about his catch.
ack! new record for puns per word ratio!
Well, sometimes you lose your bait and sometimes you win. I'm glad to have sailfished through this school, with flying-fish colors...
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