When the local rag (Fort Worth Startlegram) called my mother a few years ago to try to get her to subscribe, she mentioned the liberal extremism of the paper, and the lady said something like "Well, Molly Ivins is only in the paper two days a week now." Then my mother said she hated all the black stuff, and the solicitor got a little defensive and said "What do you mean black stuff?" My mother said "You know, all that black stuff that gets all over your hands when you turn the pages."
This post made me chuckle!