Posted on 05/01/2005 4:54:50 AM PDT by Rebelbase
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - First Lady Laura Bush grabbed the stage from President Bush at the White House correspondents annual dinner on Saturday and confessed to all his early bedtimes had turned her into a "desperate housewife."
Laura Bush, who is often seen smiling sweetly at her husband's side, stood up just in time to rescue the audience of political heavyweights and Hollywood celebrities from Bush's retelling of a joke about steel rail "cattle guards" that bombed before a Montana town meeting in March.
"Not that old joke -- not again," Laura Bush said, as her husband willingly relinquished the stage.
"I've been attending these dinners for years and just quietly sitting there," the First Lady told the audience. "Well, I've got a few things I want to say for a change."
One of her main targets was the president's bed time.
"I said to him the other day, 'George, if you really want to end tyranny in this world, you're going to have to stay up later,"' Laura Bush said. "Nine o'clock and Mr. Excitement here is in bed, and I am watching 'Desperate Housewives' -- with Lynne Cheney. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a desperate housewife."
Laura Bush also ribbed her husband for his notoriously rowdy youth, but said they were meant to be together.
"I was a librarian that spent 12 hours a day in the library. Yet somehow I met George."
Laura Bush's string of one-liners generated hearty laughs from the audience, which included celebrity names such as Richard Gere, Mary Tyler Moore, Venus and Serena Williams, Goldie Hawn and Elle MacPherson, as well as journalists and politicians.
The roasting continued as comedian Cedric the Entertainer took the stage, even though he conceded that "I thought I could follow the president. The first lady is something different."
He said Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has two sides to her, one that's all business and one that has street credibility.
"Condi is the person you see on television with the nice hair, and then there's Leezza, the one with her hair wrapped up on the phone with her girlfriends watching BET (Black Entertainment Television)."
I also loved the part about the President solving every problem he encounters with a chainsaw.
Laura said their daughters call it the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
She said that's why he gets along so well with Cheney and Rumsfeld.
Also said that the ranch air is so brisk that when Cheney comes to visit, he puts on his hiking boots, and goes out for a long 20 to 30 YARD hike.
She had some very funny comments about the Bushes in Maine too.
First prize is a 3 day vacation with the Bushes.
Second prize is a 10 day vacation with them.
Good natured ribbing which is meant and taken in good humor is a wonderful part of life.
'Desperate Housewife' Laura Grabs Stage from Bush
The media has elected to censor the inappropriate marks.
If the remaks are appropriate, funny and simply "Good natured ribbing", there would be no need to edit out the Chipendale and "Dollar Bill" punch line.
I'm proud of George. He's learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What's worse, it was a male horse."
When I heard that comment I knew that was going to cause trouble!!!
Wrong - the media edited the remarks to make the jokes unfunny and Mrs. Bush look inappropriate.
In print the jokes fall a bit flatter than as delivered and without printing them in their entirety leave thm open to speculation.
We have a wonderful first lady, just imagine the drunken slob we might have been stuck with! cold chills run through me at the thought.
you know...
and what's worse is that some on FR are now siding with the media, as of the media cares about what is decent and what isnt.
Tell you the truth, I think they are all trolls....
"I'm proud of George. He's learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What's worse, it was a male horse."
If the media's intention was to make the First Lady look bad, they would be showing the "milk the horse" clip.
I honestly can't believe I am reading some of these comments.
The milking the horse bit was was of the funniest things I have heard in a long time.....it was hilariously funny and not inappropriate in any way at all.
If the remaks are appropriate, funny and simply "Good natured ribbing", there would be no need to edit out the Chipendale and "Dollar Bill" punch line.
ON FR it is being assumed that the MSM is behaving appropriately in softening and supporting the First Lady's presentation.
And over at DU it is assumed they are doing the same thing, onliy it is treasonous Rove orchestrated collaboration.
That's what I heard too. I loved the bit about DeLeeza saying, "North Korea did what? Mr. President, hold my purse."
Hsh! you haven't seen the meltdown over at DU. There is no media love over there.
LOL. I loved that N. Korea line, except I didn't hear the "Mr. President, hold my purse." part. I was already laughing.
That's why I need to watch it again.
LOL...
well hopefully the next edition of DUmmy FUnnies will cover it :)
Amen! There is a time to have laughter! The First Lady was excellent!
If she gets any cuter, George is gonna have to keep her locked up!
Laura in 2008!
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