'Desperate Housewife' Laura Grabs Stage from Bush

(Reuters) ^ | 5/1/05 | By Karey Wutkowski

[Rebelbase]

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - First Lady Laura Bush grabbed the stage from President Bush at the White House correspondents annual dinner on Saturday and confessed to all his early bedtimes had turned her into a "desperate housewife."

Laura Bush, who is often seen smiling sweetly at her husband's side, stood up just in time to rescue the audience of political heavyweights and Hollywood celebrities from Bush's retelling of a joke about steel rail "cattle guards" that bombed before a Montana town meeting in March.

"Not that old joke -- not again," Laura Bush said, as her husband willingly relinquished the stage.

"I've been attending these dinners for years and just quietly sitting there," the First Lady told the audience. "Well, I've got a few things I want to say for a change."

One of her main targets was the president's bed time.

"I said to him the other day, 'George, if you really want to end tyranny in this world, you're going to have to stay up later,"' Laura Bush said. "Nine o'clock and Mr. Excitement here is in bed, and I am watching 'Desperate Housewives' -- with Lynne Cheney. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a desperate housewife."

Laura Bush also ribbed her husband for his notoriously rowdy youth, but said they were meant to be together.

"I was a librarian that spent 12 hours a day in the library. Yet somehow I met George."

Laura Bush's string of one-liners generated hearty laughs from the audience, which included celebrity names such as Richard Gere, Mary Tyler Moore, Venus and Serena Williams, Goldie Hawn and Elle MacPherson, as well as journalists and politicians.

The roasting continued as comedian Cedric the Entertainer took the stage, even though he conceded that "I thought I could follow the president. The first lady is something different."

He said Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has two sides to her, one that's all business and one that has street credibility.

"Condi is the person you see on television with the nice hair, and then there's Leezza, the one with her hair wrapped up on the phone with her girlfriends watching BET (Black Entertainment Television)."

[nuconvert]

Yes, that sounds accurate to me.
And it was very funny.

[Dilbert56]

Left out of that quote, in the elipses, was a line about seeing Ruth Ginsburg and Sandra Day O'Connor at Chippendales.

[joylyn]

Lighten up.

[truthkeeper]

I watched it. Yes, the quote is accurate.

[swampfx]

Yes, that sounds accurate to me.

I am surprised.I thought someone was making it up to make her look bad.

Did the Laura Bush also say this?

"I'm proud of George. He's learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What's worse, it was a male horse."

[Right_in_Virginia]

Yes.

[Aunt Polgara]

Yes, she did say the bit about Chippendales, and then said she was going to keep it quiet, but they ran into Ruth Bader Guinsberg and Sandra Day O'Conner there. It was very funny because it was so implausible.

The whole bit was talking about George being a boring kind of guy, so the girls had to have some excitement. It was sweet, but you had to hear it to get the drift. Think about the POTUS being boring and the librarian being the daring one. It just showed what a real, down-home sense of humor she has, making fun of both herself and GWB.

[nuconvert]

Yup.
The First Lady shocked people. But she was very funny.
You should catch it on CSPAN. I'm sure they'll run it many times.

[swampfx]

"I'm proud of George. He's learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What's worse, it was a male horse."

Is this accurate?

Is it just me that thinks maybe a First Lady should restrict comments like this in public?

[joyful1]

I hate to constantly be the wet blanket...but I feel the curtain is going down, as the fiddler keeps playing.

clearly, sadly, (I am not a Christian) I feel like the end times are near for this great nation...

[truthkeeper]

Also accurate, but I thought her best line was "I'm the one who can pronounce nuclear."

[Libloather]

First lady Laura Bush (L) interrupts President George W. Bush as he was about to tell an old joke at the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner at the Washington Hilton, April 30, 2005. Mrs. Bush proceeded to roast the president, and got big laughs when she referred to her early-to-bed husband as 'Mr. Excitement' and called herself a 'desperate housewife.' REUTERS/Jonathan Ernst

[montag813]

You should catch it on CSPAN. I'm sure they'll run it many times.

Do they have it archived? Cant find it. Cspan has a terrible web site structure.

[auzerais]

C-SPAN will reair the Correspondents' Dinner today at 10AM EDT (7AMPDT) on C-SPAN3.

See C-SPAN TV Schedules for times it may be repeated on other C-SPAN channels this week.

[Northern Yankee]

C-Span had a repeat this morning, but I did not see Laura. (Did see Cedric though...) There's a thread that followed the dinner last night, and all the Freepers were gushing about Laura's performance.

Lots of fun to read.

[Northern Yankee]

Thanks for the info...

I appreciate it.

[auzerais]

I also thought Laura's comment on GW milking a male horse was in poor taste. Cedric also had a few bombs. But the Best Line was when she said her marriage with GW must have been destined with her being a librarian working in a library 12hrs/day [alluding to GW's supposedly never visiting a library].

x

[MikefromOhio]

Is it just me that thinks maybe a First Lady should restrict comments like this in public?

I am sure there are 3 or 4 others, but it's just a joke. Give it a break. Be thankful we have a first lady who has A) a wit to her that is without ambition and B) security in the fact that her Husband is the MAN that he is....

my wife cracks jokes about me all the time. It isn't that big of a deal.

[Northern Yankee]

See post # 35.

[swampfx]

There's a thread that followed the dinner last night, and all the Freepers were gushing about Laura's performance.

Clearly I am from the old school.

A First Lady promoting a show I assume is about adulterous housewives and then describing a scene where the President of the United States is masturbating a male horse, in my view, is inapproriate.

She is called the First Lady for a reason.