Posted on 04/30/2005 5:56:16 AM PDT by tuffydoodle
Nursing mom gets unwelcome reception
FW mall says security firm made a mistake
10:37 PM CDT on Friday, April 29, 2005
By KARIN KELLY / WFAA-TV
For many mothers, breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the world.
But it turned into an embarassing situation that angered a North Texas woman this week after she said a mall security guard harassed her.
Adrian Sparks was shopping at Hulen Mall Thursday, and decided to discreetly nurse her eight-month-old baby under a blanket in the food court.
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Karin Kelly reports "The security guard came over and asked me to stop, and either go to the restroom or to leave," Sparks said.
The guard told Sparks a food court customer had complained, even though Sparks was covered with a blanket.
"I told him it was perfectly legal for me to nurse my child," Sparks said. "And that they sell clothes more revealing that what I was doing right here."
Of course, it is legal - but soon another manager approached.
"He said, 'well those rules don't apply because we're a private facility,'" she recalled.
Friends who breastfeed have rushed in for support.
"The human race wouldn't exist without breast milk," said nursing mom Rachel Tarbutton.
Some are members of La Leche League, an organization that supports mother's milk for health and bonding benefits..
"To know that she is getting everything she needs from me, from my body, is (important)," Sparks said.
Mall officials said the incident was not normal procedure, and that t heir new security company made a mistake.
"That is not a Hulen Mall policy," said manager Kevin Davies. " We support what she was doing, we support moms and all of our customers, and feel badly this occurred."
That's not all that reassuring for Sparks, though.
"I don't think I'll ever be able to shop there again, because I was just so upset about it," she said.
"Not to even mention, breast pumps are not near as efficient as a baby."
I can sympathize. I tried using an electric pump to relieve the pressure when my daughter started sleeping through the night. I got several clogs (painful!) and one infection as a result (even more painful!) that I had to be put on antibiotics to treat. I can't tell you how much that sucked.
I guess so--there are a lot of perverts in the world. What's ridiculous is that the way I nursed my children, my skin did not even show. There was nothing sexual about it.
Do NOT take yourself out of your bra in public and expect people not to notice, or to be grossed out.
Prediction: When you have a baby you will change your whole attitude.
I don't have children. My sister has three, and doesn't nurse outside her own house. My mother had three, and didn't nurse the two of us who nursed outside our house. Several of my friends have children, and they nurse inside the house only.
I've never had an abortion either. By your "logic," this disqualifies me to voice my opinion on abortion.
If the kid was covered, this implies the act was concealed. Then how did the guard know that she was breast feeding?
The problem comes from the double standard of baring breasts in public places. If you don't have a baby attached to It, it's licentious and lewd. If a baby is attached, it's loving and nurturing. All these women who bare them for a baby would never dream of baring them for show. This logic drives men nuts.
I doubt I will, because I have seen the wonders a rigorously regular schedule will work on a child, and the harm a free-for-all, let-him-eat-whenever-and-do-what-he-wants-whenever non-schedule wreaks.
I prefer the former, becaus I prefer well-bred children to screaming wild brats.
I would note that my two friends who breast-fed in public were the two friends who fed the kid on demand, not on schedule. They are also the two friends whose children I cannot bear to be around, because they'd make Democratic Underground look sane by comparison.
It's entirely possible that there was a blanket sort of around the kid, but that Mom there wasn't exactly fully covered.
I've seen stuff in public that we'd fine a network for showing.
Hell, I think we DID fine a network for that.
I don't mind breast feeding in public. I just can't find a woman who will let me do it.
"Not at all. I am quite pleasant to be around. I'm funny and quick, and people say I'm attractive"
If someone really has these qualities, they don't have to try to convince everyone of it.
Sorry, but if you are P-whipped, I can't help you.
I knew a girl of 22 who used a breast pump during lunch, but the milk in the frig/freezer (don't remember which) and took it home every night. Kid had milk during the day in a bottle, and mama had bottles made up when she had to leave somewhere. She breast fed when she was home and at night when baby cried.
Well, she was very upset and she may never be able to shop there again. Surely you can see that this is the height of suffering. Have some compassion. (/sarc)
"I don't think I'll ever be able to shop there again, because I was just so upset about it," she said.
Nope (and don't change the subject), but you've proven how ignorance can help people say some pretty stupid things!
At one time I thought all a crying kid needed was some discipline. Ha! What a load!
Kids cry when they're wet, tired, hungry or any combination.
After YOU have tried to run errands with just one itty bitty baby you might not sound so silly in your opinions.
Let's see....you, a non parent with no personal experience with babies, are arguing with many Freeper parents who have been there-done that...
We've been involved in REALITY, not pretending to be a TV show character!
I don't think stating something to one poster on FR is "trying to convince everyone". When I launch into a big explanation and description, and I address it to All, then you might be able to accuse me of "trying to convince everyone."
Until then, let's stay on topic, which is that public nursing is gross and women shouldn't do it.
"I doubt I will, because I have seen the wonders a rigorously regular schedule will work on a child, and the harm a free-for-all, let-him-eat-whenever-and-do-what-he-wants-whenever non-schedule wreaks.
I prefer the former, becaus I prefer well-bred children to screaming wild brats.
I would note that my two friends who breast-fed in public were the two friends who fed the kid on demand, not on schedule. They are also the two friends whose children I cannot bear to be around, because they'd make Democratic Underground look sane by comparison."
Nice. Anecdotal evidence to support an argument that public breastfeeding is somehow 1) only done because the moms who do it don't have their child on a feeding schedule, 2) bad parenting, and 3) leads to out of control kids. I am almost speechless at the absolute stupidity, arrogance, and total ignorance of this argument.
If the scene is so objectionable, then why do some try so hard to see what is going on?
A paranoid husband (I assume in this day of same sex marraiges) holding onto his breast baring wife is a show that would take supremem will power to not stare at.
First, untwist your panties. Having them all bunched like that will make you walk funny.
Second, the fact that I haven't actually borne any children does not mean I haven't been responsible for any children's care. I cannot believe I have to explain this to an alleged adult.
Third, when your baby gets what he wants whenever he wants, he will grow into a toddler who expects to get what he wants whenever he wants.
Did I use words that were short enough for you to understand, or shall I try again?
I never nursed in a public area. I didn't do it because I wanted to spend that time one on one with my baby. I didn't want to be distracted by people I didn't know.
Breast feeding isn't just about giving the baby your milk. If that were the case then a breast pump would be perfect. Breast feeding is also about bonding and nurturing. I can't imagine it's good for a baby to have to be distracted either.
IMHO Mothers who nurse when shopping or at restaraunts are simply acting selfish. You do have to give up some things when you have children. And waiting till the baby is fed to go out, or not going out as much shouldn't be a big deal. I managed to do it, silly me.
Spoken like someone who has never nursed a baby.
Breastfed babies don't do routines well.
Picking one's nose and eating it is gross...seeing a woman with a baby, especially if done discreetly, isn't.
Absent large-scale statistical studies, of which on this topic I suspect there will be a lack, anecdotal evidence is all we have to go on.
Further, since this is a matter of opinion and not "fact," anecdotal evidence is all that is relevant.
So bring it on, mama. You're just mad that I don't celebrate the glory of motherhood because I don't want to see hoots in public.
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