Wilbanks NOT Abducted

Fox News ^ | 04/30/05 | Fox News

[Squantos]

Did you use this ?

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[Squantos]

Awesome post.....LOL !

[oprahstheantichrist]

Fascinating observations. I've known of a few myself, and they're quite interesting as long as they're not TOO close.

I would disagree with you that the pressure of accomplishment in itself "leads" to the narcissism, and I have far less sympathy for them than you do. The only thing leading to the narcissism is love of the self.

I used to say the same thing, that "someday, there'll be a BIG crisis," and it'll all come to a head, but now I don''t think so (20+ years of observation). They seem to be very intuitive in terms of what they can get away with regarding whom, and just how far they can push. They avoid people and situations to begin with, that can't be easily controlled.

[oprahstheantichrist]

"I suspected something was a little off about her. She has a scared expression in every pic I've seen, eyes a little more open I mean.

My suspicions about that were confirmed when I found out she wears contacts. For some reason contacts appear to have that effect on some people."

She's SO thin though. Very thin, athletic, buggy eyes: Graves Disease (autoimmune hyperactive thyroid; extreme example, Marty Feldman aka "Igor").

[Graymatter]

What she did was criminal mischief. That's not all she should be charged with, but it certainly is that. Think what would happen if a 32-year-old woman had an impulse to pull a fire alarm, for the thrill of it, for attention, for some unconscious cry for help or whatever other bolshoi passes for excuse these days. Don't you think people who call in false alarms should be prosecuted?
This is no child. The woman had to know what would happen if she vanished while jogging, a few days before her wedding.

She should have her head examined --- and then face charges.

[CitizenM]

ROFLOL....Oh, FReepers are so good at slicing through the fog! Terrrifffficly, clever post. I'll have that tune in my mind all night now.

[pleasedontzotme]

Well, now, this is stirring up the hornets nest that is my brain.

I happen to know of a man who is a narcissist who has completely destroyed all those in his wake, relatively intentionally. He is professionally accomplished, although unable to keep a job. He is an emotional mutant, to say the least. To say I despise this person does not do justice the emotions I have for him.

I believe his narcissisim (and he, unlike the two people I discussed in my original post, has been diagnosed with it) is far more ingrained than the other two. One of the two, I know only from a distance and so could not say that she has the pattern of sucking you in just to show you how great she is (that is, btw, called narcissistic supply). It wouldn't surprise me. The second one, and the one who I am friends with, does have that pattern and I suspect she is a narcissist. I also suspect there are a few other issues.

But, the two I discussed in my original post, do NOT have the pattern of a narcissist in that their professional/academic accomplishments do not involve a period of great achievement followed by a complete flameout.

The other characteristic about the two people I discussed in my original post, and which I think is very applicable here, is a VERY rigid adherence to boundaries and rules. A narcissist knows no boundaries. These two, on the other hand, rely on the rules and boundaries to keep themselves in the game, and feeling superior to everyone else. (And, let's be clear: I think they are a good thing and what keeps society in check, but when they separate you from society and norms of the culture, it becomes something completely different.)

I think Jennifer Wilbanks went through her life doing exactly what was expected of her. Her family was prominent in the community, obviously well-off. She was getting married in a large ceremony. Much pressure on her to perform, just as there always had been. For her to just say, "I don't want to get married, let's call it off," was outside of the boundaries of what she thought she "could" do. Hence, the meltdown, and what I think is the proof of the big crisis.

So, I guess what I am saying is, I'm not classifying Jennifer Wilbanks as a narcissist. I'm classifying her as someone who's done what was expected of her for too long without going outside of the ropes at all or experiencing any of the normal rebellion. And I certainly do not condone what she did.

Having disagreed with you there, the following comment is so accurate:

They seem to be very intuitive in terms of what they can get away with regarding whom, and just how far they can push. They avoid people and situations to begin with, that can't be easily controlled.

Yes! Yes! Yes! Bravo! You're absolutely right!

But I tend to think we are dealing with two different things here: One is malignant narcissism (very nasty indeed, leaves a trail of destruction in your wake, and is incurable); the other is overachievism, which manifests itself with multiple narcissistic traits.

I guess the storal of the mory is this: Balance, people. Balance. And watch how much pressure your kids are putting on themselves.

/armchair psychology (for now, anyway ;-) )

[LowOiL]

From your profile page. I think you're a 'holier-than-thou' type. In other words, a hyprocrite.

The term you found objectionable was found in 80 verses in the Bible.

The very first entry... listed below.

Gen 12:16 And he entreated Abram well, for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels.

[LowOiL]

Bull. Mind your own business unless someone asks you to become a moderator.

Tell that to the Admin Moderator who wrote it. It is not my quote. I left the source for you to figure that out on your own.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1070896/posts

Ping em and tell the "Bull" yourself...

[Dave S]

Tell that to the Admin Moderator who wrote it. It is not my quote. I left the source for you to figure that out on your own

If the moderator has anything he wants to say to me he will, he doesnt need your help. So get off your high horse and get back on your knees, sinner.

[securityMama]

I say show her mercy. Her family can probably reimburse the local authorities for the expense of the search. This situation could have been much worse.

[LowOiL]

If the moderator has anything he wants to say to me he will, he doesnt need your help. So get off your high horse and get back on your knees, sinner.

LOL, you are the one that responded/pinged to me, not vice versa. Take your own advice.

For me, I keep the following in mind when deal with people like you.

The proof for John the Baptist that Jesus was the Christ was that the blind see, the lame walk and the majority are "offended" by Him (Mat. 11:2-19). As Jesus said, "Blessed is he who is not offended because of Me" (Mat. 11:6; Luke 7:23). In Galilee, Jesus did not plead with his neighbors to understand Him when "they were offended at Him" (Mat. 13:57; Mark 6:3). If unbelievers are offended, so be it (cf. Luke 14:3-4; John 5:8-16). "Shake off the dust from your feet" (Mat. 10:14)

[oprahstheantichrist]

"I'm not classifying Jennifer Wilbanks as a narcissist. I'm classifying her as someone who's done what was expected of her for too long without going outside of the ropes at all or experiencing any of the normal rebellion."

Oh, I wouldn't say she's a narcissist either, we don't have enough info about "the rest of the story" (as Paul Harvey would say) to guess one way or another.

I'm just grateful and encouraged to see that someone else besides me notices some types in general (narcissists) and finds their behavior, especially the tendency to use people, is offensive and worth observation. Most people don't even notice anything unusual.

I used to think it was really rare in common circles, but lately it seems it's an epidemic or something.

If you've never read it, "People of the Lie" by M. Scott Peck is a great book. He illustrates more the "malignant" type, but that would stand to reason for authorship purposes. Same guy who wrote "The Road Less Traveled," though not as widely acclaimed, as the mental health community gets nervous when you discuss "good" and "evil," and Peck even mentions God. They hate that.

Jennifer? Big, big wedding, and then skipping town four days beforehand, tells me she just doesn't love the guy. The "boundaries" thing applies in that he seems just SO PERFECT (NICE loving, generous guy, NICE prominent wealthy family), and if he's SO perfect and SO devoted to her, she must have felt that she SHOULD love him. He taught Sunday School for heaven's sake!

That I've seen before too. The guy's just TOO nice, and she just freezes. But then she feels guilt, because how many lonely girls would love to have a guy with all those qualities? So she goes along, assuming these feelings (or NON-feelings) will go away. Instead, they get worse. Big Day draws closer, so it all gets worse, till it pops.

It's not the pressure of the event that causes it though. If she loved him, she'd certainly want it "over with," but she'd be looking forward to being married to him, finally.

Yes, "Armchair Analyst" is fun. Especially since we can't get sued (hardly as profitable though....).

[Dave S]

The proof for John the Baptist that Jesus was the Christ was that the blind see, the lame walk and the majority are "offended" by Him

So now I understand, you are claiming to be the Christ. No wonder you think you can lord it over everyone else.

[LowOiL]

So now I understand

You understand little, blather a lot.

[Dave S]

You understand little, blather a lot

You looking in the mirror again?