Any discussion of abortion is fraught with peril when all sides positions are not clearly understood. On the one hand, you have the desire for an open dialog, and on the other, the realization by some that 44 million abortions have taken place.
Just speaking from experience, and living in an extremely rigidly pro-choice region of the country, I've come to associate the "no-compromise" position with those for abortion: "for any reason, because she wants it", without any regard to the pain felt by the little one, viable and more humane alternative like adoption, or the injustice of it all (capital punishment for one not guilty of a capital crime). Perhaps your experiences, too, are partly driven by the region of the country in which you live.
Another danger is that of sounding "extreme" for naming abortion as murder, which can provoke a "kill the messenger" response.
Not knowing your position on this issue, it's difficult to say any more. I would only implore you, please, don't direct anger you have at the admittedly blunt and gruff rhetoric of some in the pro-life movement toward the little ones, who have done nothing.
Well, as I said earlier, I'm not going after pro-lifers. I am pro-life.
I'm going after those among us who are holding back progress in this fight by their absolutist, thus losing, strategies.
When I see this many people say that they will sit home simply because someone is "either pro-life or pro-murder," I see the same poor thinking among the pro-life activists here. They are reviled. You're right - where we live probably does affect our perception.
My only point is that it is a bad idea to
a) not do everything we can to stop a liberal from being elected, and
b) be so offensive and absolutist that we alienate grassroots supporters
I believe doing so has caused the agenda to be marginalized and less effective than it should be in ending things on which most Americans already side with us.
Someone thinks that means I'm so out of touch with reality that I deserve scorn. I believe that over-reaction just proves my point.