Posted on 02/01/2005 5:36:06 PM PST by Aussie Dasher
NORTH Korean leader Kim Jong Il will fall in love with US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and lead the world to terror kingpin Osama bin Laden's lair.
Meanwhile, he will kidnap a famous movie director and cast Hong Kong actor Chow Yun Fat in Asia's own James Bond film. These are among the more outrageous predictions of Hong Kong feng shui masters for the coming Year of the Rooster contained in a Chinese New Year horoscope published today by a leading bank.
Kim will also cheat death in a botched assassination plot, open up his reclusive Stalinist state's nuclear weapons plant to foreign tourists and lead the world to terror kingpin Osama bin Laden's lair, CSLA Asia Pacific Markets' annual survey of geomancers predicts.
"Kim Jong-Il will face some conflict and much excitement," the report, entitled Rooster Oracles predicts.
"Kim ... falls under the spell and in love with ... Rice," it continues. "She encourages him to develop tourism and ... (he) will seek to promote the unique selling point to travellers of being able to see how nuclear bombs are made."
While the predictions are more than a little tongue in cheek, they are contained in an annual report, now in its 14th year, that claims to have at least accurately predicted past economic trends.
"Last year we were remarkably accurate," said Chris Zee, investment analyst and self-proclaimed Wicked Sorcerer of the East, who put together this year's report after consulting several Hong Kong feng shui masters.
He claims last year's survey for the Chinese Year of the Monkey predicted a booming property market in Hong Kong and stronger oil and gold prices.
For 2005, Hong Kong's economy will grow at a robust six per cent, the US dollar will continue its fall, property prices will continue to soar and the stock market will have a roller-coaster 12 months, it predicts.
If much of this sounds a little too outrageous, however, take heed. A caveat in the report warns "don't take it all too seriously. Some may dismiss it as pure bull, but in securities and investment, bullishness often pays off".
WHAT??...im lost on that thread
Call nme stupid, but isn't feng shui a decorating concept.
Ya Right.........LOL Now thats some serious WISHFULL thinking running amok
Is Kim Jong IL ronery?
HE SO WRONRY!! he needs OBL at this side
Maybe he'll do it with style and good vibes.
So Very ronery.
Well now, don't discount this idea -- (chuckle) -- Kim Sick Ill has been selling weapons to the middle east for some time, and my guess is that if he could get some political mileage to save his miserable butt, he just might pull a "rabbit" out of a hat....
Food for thought...(chuckle)
LOL, and a herd of pigs will soar past my window :-)
Wait Wait!!! When will Sir Run-run Shaw weigh in?!?!?!?
Sounds like an oriental soap opera. And yeah, I could see Condi falling for Kim Jong Il in a heartbeat---when hell freezes over.
has kim been reading "catcher in the rye"?
that book seems to be the origin of a lot of people's problems.
"BROND.........SHAMES BROND"
Hasn't Kim Jong Il been MIA for awhile? In fact, since about the time TEAM AMERICA came out. I think his feelings were really hurt or something.
Perhaps he's trying to find a new hairdresser?
What about OJ?
Will he find the "real killer?"
Kim's new song!
"I'm ronery, So ronery... so Very ronery...
I love Condi with all my heart!"
Hopefully SECSTATE will never have to meet that platform heel wearing geek face to face......
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