LOL I think you should join in with the group of Brits calling voters in Ohio.
That effort is organised by the Guardian. They haven't had decent reporting since George Orwell was on their staff. I wouldn't use it to paper train a hound from hell. I wouldn't use it to contain the vomit of a thousand drunken Chelsea fans. I wouldn't use it in a crumpled ball to shove into Teresa Kerry's mouth as a pacifier. Rather, it is only worthy to line the depths of the Paris sewer, consumed by a million radioactive cockroaches for eternity.
Regards, Ivan