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Mark Steyn : This Is One Armchair Warmonger Still Fighting
The Telegraph ^ | May 30, 2004 | Mark Steyn

Posted on 05/29/2004 5:16:29 PM PDT by quidnunc

After a couple of weeks away, I return to spend a lonely evening talking to myself at the eerily deserted Armchair Warmongers Club (Fleet Street Branch). Where'd everybody go?

A year ago, Anatole Kaletsky was buoyant and sunny: "The vast majority of Iraqis will soon find themselves incomparably freer and better off than at any time in the past 50 years." Now he's sunk in his own columnar quagmire: "Iraq will indeed now replace Vietnam as the byword for America's military humiliation, its strategic incompetence, its wayward moral compass," etc, etc.

His Times colleague Mary Ann Sieghart has flounced off, too: "That's it! I've had enough. I'm fed up with justifying the war in Iraq to sceptical friends, family and acquaintances." The standard rap against us armchair warriors is that we can't stand the heat of real war, but poor Mary Ann can't stand the heat of real armchairs. The chap on the sofa at that dinner party was just too beastly and sceptical.

Tony Parsons, hitherto the token non-anti-American at the Daily Mirror, feels cheap and used. "Tony Blair fooled me," he says bitterly. "I see now it was all a pack of lies."

-snip-

(Excerpt) Read more at telegraph.co.uk ...


TOPICS: Editorial; Extended News; Foreign Affairs; United Kingdom; War on Terror
KEYWORDS: armchairwarmonger; iraq; marksteyn; marksteynlist; steyn
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1 posted on 05/29/2004 5:16:29 PM PDT by quidnunc
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To: quidnunc

This is one armchair warmonger still fighting
By Mark Steyn
(Filed: 30/05/2004)

After a couple of weeks away, I return to spend a lonely evening talking to myself at the eerily deserted Armchair Warmongers Club (Fleet Street Branch). Where'd everybody go?

A year ago, Anatole Kaletsky was buoyant and sunny: "The vast majority of Iraqis will soon find themselves incomparably freer and better off than at any time in the past 50 years." Now he's sunk in his own columnar quagmire: "Iraq will indeed now replace Vietnam as the byword for America's military humiliation, its strategic incompetence, its wayward moral compass," etc, etc.

His Times colleague Mary Ann Sieghart has flounced off, too: "That's it! I've had enough. I'm fed up with justifying the war in Iraq to sceptical friends, family and acquaintances." The standard rap against us armchair warriors is that we can't stand the heat of real war, but poor Mary Ann can't stand the heat of real armchairs. The chap on the sofa at that dinner party was just too beastly and sceptical.

Tony Parsons, hitherto the token non-anti-American at the Daily Mirror, feels cheap and used. "Tony Blair fooled me," he says bitterly. "I see now it was all a pack of lies."

With moulting hawks all around squawking their forlorn chorus of "I'm No Longer Such An Ugly Duckling", it's tempting to join the mass ecdysis. But this is one leopard who won't be changing his spots. Fourteen months ago, there were respectable cases to be made for and against the war. None of the big stories of the past few weeks alters either argument.

The bleats of "Include me out!" from the fairweather warriors isn't a sign of their belated moral integrity but of their fundamental unseriousness. Anyone who votes for the troops to go in should be grown-up enough to know that, when they do, a few of them will kill civilians, bomb schools, abuse prisoners. It happens in every war. These aren't stunning surprises, they're inevitable: it might be a bombed mosque or a hospital, a shattered restaurant or a slaughtered wedding party, but it will certainly be something.

Okay, a freaky West Virginia tramp leading a naked Iraqi round on a dog leash with a pair of Victoria's Secret panties on his head and a banana up his butt, maybe that wasn't so inevitable. But, that innovation aside, the aberrations of war have nothing to do with the only question that matters: despite what will happen along the way, is it worth doing?

I say yes. It is already worth it for Iraq. There are more than 8,000 towns and villages in the country. If the much predicted civil war had erupted in any of 'em, you'd see it. Not from the Western press corps holed up with its Ba'ath Party translators at the Palestine Hotel, but from Arab television networks eager to show the country going to hell. They cannot show it you because it isn't happening. The Sunni Triangle is a little under-policed, but even that's not aflame. Moqtada al-Sadr, the Khomeini-Of-The-Week in mid-April, is al-Sadr al-Wiser these days, down to his last two 12-year-old insurgents and unable even to get to the mosque on Friday to deliver his weekly widely-ignored call to arms.

Meanwhile, more and more towns are holding elections and voting in "secular independents and representatives of non-religious parties". I have been trying to persuade my Washington pals to look on Iraq as an exercise in British-style asymmetrical federalism: the Kurdish areas are Scotland, the Shia south is Wales, the Sunni Triangle is Northern Ireland. No need to let the stragglers in one area slow down progress elsewhere. Iraq won't be perfect, but it will be okay - and in much better shape than most of its neighbours.

So I've moved on. I am already looking for new regimes to topple. And here's where the events of recent weeks may have done some damage. In my corner of northern New England, as in Highgate and Holland Park, it is also stressful being a Bush apologist. Most of the guys I hang out with demand to know why he's being such a wimp, why's he kissing up to King Abdullah about a few stray bananas in some jailhouse, why's he being such a pantywaist about not letting our boys fire on mosques, why hasn't he levelled Fallujah. In other words, don't make the mistake of assuming that Bush's poll numbers on Iraq have fallen because people want him to be more multilateralist and accommodating. On my anecdotal evidence, they want him to be more robust and incendiary.

And evidently John Kerry's internal polling is telling him the same thing. Hence, his speech in Seattle on Friday: "This country is united in its determination to destroy you," he told the terrorists. "As commander in chief, I will bring the full force of our nation's power to bear on finding and crushing your networks. We will use every available resource to destroy you." Winning the Presidency isn't like winning the Palme d'Or, and Kerry, the ne plus ultra of weathervane politicians, seems to have figured there aren't enough votes in sounding like Michael Moore, Howard Dean or even Al Gore. With an eye to her own political viability, Hillary Clinton the other day demanded an expansion of the army.

Does Kerry mean it? Probably not. The tough talk's a cover for what would be a return to the ineffectual reactive national-security policy of the 1990s - "I have here a piece of paper from Kim Jong-Il," etc. If the media manage to drag the Senator, a very weak candidate, over the finishing line, it will be seen as a humiliating verdict on Bush's war. There will be no stomach for further neo-con adventuring. The House of Saud can relax and resume its buying off of al-Qaeda. Pakistan's ISI can get rid of General Musharraf. The IAEA can go back to sleep and let Iran get on with its nuclear programme. And, after months and months of experts telling them that they didn't have enough troops in Iraq, Washington will realise all the extra troops they needed are sitting around twiddling their thumbs in Europe, guarding against enemies who no longer exist on behalf of allies who are no longer allies.

Such a world would be a more dangerous place, but not necessarily for Americans. It is Europe that's closer and more vulnerable to terrorists, dysfunctional states and other enemies. That is why I'm a relatively relaxed hawk. The US may be forced to suffer the perception of defeat, but it is Europe that will live with the consequences. Be careful what you wish for.


2 posted on 05/29/2004 5:29:05 PM PDT by Gritty ("Islam sees only a world totally under the rule of Islam; complete and final victory-M Sharon)
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To: quidnunc
Such a world would be a more dangerous place, but not necessarily for Americans. It is Europe that's closer and more vulnerable to terrorists, dysfunctional states and other enemies. That is why I'm a relatively relaxed hawk. The US may be forced to suffer the perception of defeat, but it is Europe that will live with the consequences. Be careful what you wish for.

Steyn never ceases to amaze me. In the immortal words of Kelso: Burn!!!

It happens in every war. These aren't stunning surprises, they're inevitable: it might be a bombed mosque or a hospital, a shattered restaurant or a slaughtered wedding party, but it will certainly be something.

Okay, a freaky West Virginia tramp leading a naked Iraqi round on a dog leash with a pair of Victoria's Secret panties on his head and a banana up his butt, maybe that wasn't so inevitable.


I'm sorry, but that is just really funny lol
3 posted on 05/29/2004 5:32:56 PM PDT by visualops ("I....haven't got any bones.".."Nonsense, nonsense. You'd fall down without them.")
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With moulting hawks all around squawking their forlorn chorus of "I'm No Longer Such An Ugly Duckling", it's tempting to join the mass ecdysis... Moqtada al-Sadr, the Khomeini-Of-The-Week in mid-April, is al-Sadr al-Wiser these days...

Does this guy have a way with words, or what!!??

4 posted on 05/29/2004 5:36:51 PM PDT by Gritty ("Equality is unacceptable to Islam. The non-believer cannot be the equal of the believer-Amir Taheri)
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To: Gritty

..."There are more than 8,000 towns and villages in the country. If the much predicted civil war had erupted in any of 'em, you'd see it. Not from the Western press corps holed up with its Ba'ath Party translators at the Palestine Hotel, but from Arab television networks eager to show the country going to hell. They cannot show it you because it isn't happening."...

That's right.


5 posted on 05/29/2004 5:36:57 PM PDT by jolie560
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To: quidnunc
[ one armchair warmonger ]

That would be Max Cleland

6 posted on 05/29/2004 5:41:36 PM PDT by hosepipe (This propaganda has been edited to include some fully orbed hyperbole....)
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To: Gritty
What I want to know is, is Mark Steyn a nuclear-powered writing machine that works 24/7 to crank out excellent articles for every reputable newspaper in the known universe? Sees that way. Fortunately there are only a handfil of reputable newspapers, or the Steyn machine would be worked to the point of overload, explosion, and failure.

Congressman Billybob

Latest Article, "Why Bush's War College Speech Fell Flat"

7 posted on 05/29/2004 5:42:25 PM PDT by Congressman Billybob (www.ArmorforCongress.com Visit. Join. Help. Please.)
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To: visualops
I'll say. Steyn apparently suffered writing withdrawal while on his trip and uncorked a bunch of classics in this piece.

"al-Sadr al-Wiser.."...ROFLAMAO X 10 !!!!!!!!!!

..all while nailing the truth dead on.

8 posted on 05/29/2004 5:47:24 PM PDT by chiller (JUDGES is JOB #1)
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To: visualops

'With moulting hawks all around squawking their forlorn chorus of "I'm No Longer Such An Ugly Duckling", it's tempting to join the mass ecdysis'


'Ecdysis' is the molting
of the cuticula in arthropods and related groups (Ecdysozoa)

as in cockroach


9 posted on 05/29/2004 5:47:38 PM PDT by bitt
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To: quidnunc
"In other words, don't make the mistake of assuming that Bush's poll numbers on Iraq have fallen because people want him to be more multilateralist and accommodating. On my anecdotal evidence, they want him to be more robust and incendiary."

Agreed. I am concerned that this backing down strategy is going to render the Iraq war another Viet Nam.

10 posted on 05/29/2004 5:59:47 PM PDT by TOUGH STOUGH
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To: Tax-chick

later


11 posted on 05/29/2004 6:04:13 PM PDT by Tax-chick (I'm not making this up.)
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To: Gritty
Thanks for the post.

It's a shame that real posters like you have to take the time and effort to clean up the messes partially posted by some jerks.

Anyway, you are appreciated.

12 posted on 05/29/2004 6:43:24 PM PDT by wife-mom
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To: Gritty
Okay, a freaky West Virginia tramp leading a naked Iraqi round on a dog leash with a pair of Victoria's Secret panties on his head and a banana up his butt, maybe that wasn't so inevitable. But, that innovation aside, the aberrations of war have nothing to do with the only question that matters: despite what will happen along the way, is it worth doing?

Steyn does have a way of putting everything in perspective!

13 posted on 05/29/2004 6:44:48 PM PDT by speekinout
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To: Gritty

Mark Steyn tells a few home truths. However, 'the US forced to suffer the perception of defeat' is merely media's latest rope a dope to drag Kerry across that finish line. It won't work.


14 posted on 05/29/2004 6:56:41 PM PDT by hershey
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To: Gritty
Most of the guys I hang out with demand to know why he's being such a wimp, why's he kissing up to King Abdullah about a few stray bananas in some jailhouse, why's he being such a pantywaist about not letting our boys fire on mosques, why hasn't he levelled Fallujah. In other words, don't make the mistake of assuming that Bush's poll numbers on Iraq have fallen because people want him to be more multilateralist and accommodating. On my anecdotal evidence, they want him to be more robust and incendiary.

Here, here!!! I second the motion!

15 posted on 05/29/2004 8:12:36 PM PDT by philsoc
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To: quidnunc
'the US forced to suffer the perception of defeat'

Darn, I must be out of the loop entirely. I have no perception whatsoever that the US is being defeated.

On the contrary, it appears to me that the situation is well in hand, even though the obtuse and blind US media fails to see it in their lemming-like rush to elect little Jawn F'n Kerry Heinz.

This Iraq situation is nothing like the Viet Nam defeat - nothing at all like it. I, like almost all of you, have really been proud of the American warriors who have performed spectacularly in Iraq.

16 posted on 05/29/2004 8:23:36 PM PDT by Ole Okie
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To: Ole Okie

ME too! Well spoken SIR!


17 posted on 05/29/2004 8:29:06 PM PDT by Empireoftheatom48 (God bless our troops!! Our President and those who fight against the awful commie, liberal left!!)
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To: quidnunc
Moqtada al-Sadr, the Khomeini-Of-The-Week in mid-April, is al-Sadr al-Wiser

Absolutely love this!!

I, too, have been impatient at times with the talon pullback. I remind myself that people were wondering why we were slow to go into Afghanistahn and I told myself to trust the president. I am certain that special forces were deployed quickly and helped the fight to go so well. I am hoping that similar groundwork is being laid--especially after the Berg execution.

18 posted on 05/29/2004 8:49:47 PM PDT by Ruth A.
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To: hershey; Ole Okie
You are both wrong. The line says "may". Note:
Such a world would be a more dangerous place, but not necessarily for Americans... The US may be forced to suffer the perception of defeat...

He is speaking hypothetically of a Kerry win, continuing from the previous paragraph where he lists what would happen (despite Kerry's recent tough talk for terrorists) in that event:

Does Kerry mean it? Probably not. The tough talk's a cover for what would be a return to the ineffectual reactive national-security policy of the 1990s - "I have here a piece of paper from Kim Jong-Il," etc. If the media manage to drag the Senator, a very weak candidate, over the finishing line, it will be seen as a humiliating verdict on Bush's war. There will be no stomach for further neo-con adventuring. The House of Saud can relax and resume its buying off of al-Qaeda. Pakistan's ISI can get rid of General Musharraf. The IAEA can go back to sleep and let Iran get on with its nuclear programme. And, after months and months of experts telling them that they didn't have enough troops in Iraq, Washington will realise all the extra troops they needed are sitting around twiddling their thumbs in Europe, guarding against enemies who no longer exist on behalf of allies who are no longer allies.

Scroll up to #2 and read the whole thing.
19 posted on 05/29/2004 9:09:58 PM PDT by visualops ("I....haven't got any bones.".."Nonsense, nonsense. You'd fall down without them.")
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To: Gritty
...guarding against enemies who no longer exist on behalf of allies who are no longer allies.

Too, too true. Steyn is a master wordsmith.

20 posted on 05/29/2004 9:16:10 PM PDT by Choose Ye This Day (President Bush has a September 12 mindset. John Kerry only has a November 2 obsession.)
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