Bond girls aren't easy (Britney can't meet the standard!)

Los Angeles Times ^ | April 20, 2004 | SAMANTHA BONAR

[1riot1ranger]

Bond girls aren't easy
By SAMANTHA BONAR
(c) 2004, Los Angeles Times

Britney, you are no Pussy Galore. Former Bond Girl Maryam d'Abo (Kara Milovy in 1987's The Living Daylights) with Timothy Dalton.

A recent Extra television report revealed that Britney Spears has had the gall to approach Barbara Broccoli, a producer of Bond films, with a view to becoming the next Bond Girl. .....

...A Bond Girl has sex appeal. Her allure stems from her classic beauty -- tall, lithesome, elegant. Ursula Andress (Honey Ryder) rose from the sea like a knife-wielding Aphrodite in 1962's Dr. No, the first of the Bond films. Another Dr. No Bond Girl, Sylvia Trench (played by Eunice Gayson), is described in the screenplay as "willowy, exquisitely gowned, with a classic, deceptively cold beauty." Britney, on the other hand, is already looking over-the-hill at 22. In fact, she'd look right at home in a trailer with three to five kids.....

[bondjamesbond]

[I always wanted to say that!]

Who wouldn't?

[Rockitz]

I couldn't agree more.

[FairWitness]

There is an airhead precident, however:

It's worth noting however, that Lynn Holly-Johnson (I think that is the name of the actress pictured) did not "get" Bond - she was portrayed as underage and 007 had enough morals to not bed her.

[Skooz]

She looks about 12? no wonder child molestors are on the prowl.....Beautiful Women are between 30 and 50 when there brain catches up with there looks...

She's 37.

[1riot1ranger]

"That was mean. So, someone who can't afford a 2500 SQ FT home on 10 acres and has kids is a slut? What is this fellow trying to say?"

First of all the writer was a she. Second, I think you left your < / sarcasm> tag off

[Gamecock]

But if you remember correctly, Bond was rather annoyed by the little airhead.

[Skooz]

Dang!

Or as we say down south, "Son!"

[Eric in the Ozarks]

Try 16 years in Minnesota and you'll have a different opinion.

[Long Cut]

Ms. Spears is undoubtedly a pretty girl...she has a nice figure and a cute face.

However, when one sees (or especially, HEARS) her one still sees...a GIRL.

When one sees a good "Bond Girl" (excluding Denise Richards), one sees a WOMAN.

There is a striking difference, when one looks carefully. A WOMAN is serious and confident; she is poised and unflappable. She carries herself as an adult; with strength and class. Age here does not matter...experience and attitude does.

Just ask a WOMAN what the difference between BOYS and MEN is. They can see it a mile off.

One could not picture a MAN like James Bond chasing after some giggling GIRL. He'd be either bored stiff by her or flat-out annoyed by someone like Ms. Spears. She would present absolutely NO challenge or satisfaction for such a man.

[TheBigB]

It's worth noting however, that Lynn Holly-Johnson (I think that is the name of the actress pictured) did not "get" Bond - she was portrayed as underage and 007 had enough morals to not bed her.

True. His name is "Bond, James Bond." Not "Ritter, Scott Ritter."

[archy]

But if you remember correctly, Bond was rather annoyed by the little airhead.

True enough, though he had more feline company with which to cuddle, that he didn't need to waste his attention on a fumbling kitten. We might wonder what a bored and less-well-occupied roue like the Bond described in Fleming's novels might have done with such a situation. And the Roger Moore Bond was always a twit anyway; Connery-Bond might have at least given the airhead a little education to better her future performances.

[Long Cut]

"but it had this horrible pop tart side Bond Girl. She was a figure skater I think..."

That was indeed For Your Eyes Only, which coincidentally was the movie I went to on my very first date.

She was NOT technically a "Bond Girl". That honor is reserved for women whom Bond actually slept with and/or fought for/beside.

Notice, she threw herself at Bond in that movie, but he DID NOT partake. That sort just wasn't his style.

[missyme]

Well then they did a fantastic method of making her look like a 12 year old, I bet you dollars to donuts this is not the way she looks in person at 37....Amazing not one teeny line around her eyes....

[archy]

Check this out, y'all. It's the new Barbarian Casual look.

Very nice, though the metal snap on the strap retaining your chakra seems a bit anachronistic. But you'd be welcome at the fire of the Campsite of the Mongols anyway.

You any good with a bow off a pony? The Urdu/*horde* is always looking for a few good warriors.

[missyme]

http://lavender.fortunecity.com/foxybrown/490/
I found this picture of her on the Internet, now she looks like a 37 yr old, This must be her at 12...

[Skooz]

Well, I've never seen her in person, but two or three years ago I saw her on TV without makeup. She was equally stunning.

My wife turned 37 this past January. She still doesn't have a wrinkle on her face.

[Long Cut]

"The WW movie has supposedly been "in discussion" for the past 4-5 years. No cast has bene set; names that have been mentioned are Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Lopez, Charisma Carpenter, and Cameron Diaz. Personally, my preference would be Charisma."

Lucy Lawless.

I cannot picture any other woman in the role of Wonder Woman.

[Skooz]

That picture is nice enough to post. Thanks!

[kaylar]

I found out just yesterday that Cartoon network is cutting Justice League back to one night a week. >:-(