[guitfiddlist]

A circle is a womens hierarchy which can be just as rigid as a male hierarchy. Rather than having decisions being made by whoever has the best track-record, decisions are made by whoever has the temperment to argue, and argue, and argue, until everyone else gives in. This gives women a big advantage. (I work in an environment where I can observe this close up)

I also had the chance to see this up close. I was at IBM's Defense marketing division (FSD) in LA when the whole defense market collapsed, after the Berlin Wall did. We were all told to find jobs in other divisions, or take our severances and walk. As an option to stay in LA, I evaluated working with a technical writing group that shared our building, all women - about 15 total. Sounds like a frat boy's dream? Nope.

My first interesting experience was participating in naming that particular group. After a very tedious and roundabout discussion, they settled on Technical Writers And Trainers. They were all very irritated with me when I spoke up and said "I don't...think that would be good." "Why NOT?!", they chorused. "Think of the acronym", I said, to a much quieter chorus of "Oh."(I am not making this up)

Moving on, I noticed this very rigid consensus process, where the merit of the ideas submitted had less importance than the WAY they were presented. When I suggested an idea, it was initially well received and adopted. Later on, when the same subject came back up (for no apparent reason - nothing ever seemed to be settled), it was not well received - and they went on to discuss the whole subject all over again.

I decided I couldn't deal with this, quit IBM, and became a beach bum playing schlock-rock in Manhattan Beach. This is all very anecdotal, and not necessarily proving of anything, but it was an eye-opener for me, to see the world of difference between male-dominated versus female-dominated decision-making.

[SauronOfMordor]

Moving on, I noticed this very rigid consensus process, where the merit of the ideas submitted had less importance than the WAY they were presented. When I suggested an idea, it was initially well received and adopted. Later on, when the same subject came back up (for no apparent reason - nothing ever seemed to be settled), it was not well received - and they went on to discuss the whole subject all over again.

Where I work, I frequently find myself the lone guy in a meeting with several women. One book that I've found very useful in getting me to understand how women interact with each other is "In the Company of Women" by Pat Heim, Susan, Ph.D. Murphy, Susan K. Golant

Women, especially women in groups, seem to like consensus-based solutions, where everybody has a chance to talk about what she thinks about it, and especially how she feels about it. Solutions where somebody says "Lets do A", and the women can't come up with a rational objection to A, may be adopted without visible dissent, but there will be some disgruntlement with the process. If the women manage to do a lot of back and forth and discussion until nobody can remember who originally brought A up, they're much happier.

One woman has this thing about "unilateral decision-making" -- she fins it most objectionable when I just do things without talking it over first with the group.