If you reward animalistic behavior because you are "above it" you can expect more of the same. There is a time and a place for everything.
I believe you are wrong.
First, in Saddam Hussein's world, nobody would have the balls to attack him or his loved ones the way these savages attacked and mutilated the four Americans. Saddam was a savage and ruled by doing this type of thing to innocent people, to ensure that nobody would have the balls to try similar with him and his people.
When I was a kid, my dad taught me how to make a fist ("the right way"); and he instructed me to fight back when somebody hit me. He said, "You don't just hit him one time, because he's going to come back and hit you again. You hit him, and keep on hitting him until you are damn sure he's not gonna get up." I was his first daughter; he had three more after me, and he taught us all the same.
If somebody wants to kill you, as these people have shown is their goal, you can't sit around a campfire and sing Wo-He-Lo with them. If their aim is to kill you, your aim better be to kill them first.
But I'm not a graduate of Georgetown or American University's School of Foreign Service, so this is probably not an approved method of diplomacy.
I suppose it's also a good thing that the tgslTakomas of the world are not in charge of America.