Doesn't He Remind You Of .. Finding John Kerry's archetype on television and in books -Hugh Hewitt

http://weeklystandard.com/Content/Public/Articles/000/000/003/933ledjc.asp | 04/01/04 | by Hugh Hewitt

[MNJohnnie]

JOHN KERRY reminds you of someone, but you can't put your finger on it, right?

Allow me to help.

Bookish people and television people generally carry different archetypes around in their heads, but neither group seems to able to quite put their finger on Kerry. They have seen this face, this style before. But where?

First, the small box people. John Kerry is M*A*S*H's Major Frank Burns, returned to bluster and badger and arrogantly attempt to command his betters. To those below him, Burns was a constant pain. To those above, he was obsequious in the extreme. Towards his tentmates--whom he could not believe were his equals--he was always condescending, the perfect combination of insecurity and inflated self-esteem.

Some might argue that Major Charles Emerson Winchester III is really a better match for Kerry, especially given Winchester's ponderous accent and attention to breeding.

But it's really Burns who captures the essence of the Kerry style, so recently displayed when, following his collision with a Secret Service agent charged with protecting his life, Kerry came up cursing the agent. We lack the information to make any comparisons between Theresa and Major Margaret "Hotlips" Houlihan, but both at least share a tendency toward outspokenness.

FOR THE LITERARY MINDED, the match is more obscure, but just as compelling. It requires a reach all the way back to the papers of Diedrich Knickerbocker, as arranged by Washington Irving, specifically to the character Ichabod Crane, who was "tall, but exceedingly lank, with narrow shoulders, long arms and legs, hands that dangled a mile out of his sleeves, feet that might have served as shovels, and his whole frame most loosely hung together." Ichabod's voice--"the authoritative voice of the master, in the tone of menace or of command; or peradventure, by the appalling sound of the birch, as he urged some tardy loiterer along the flowery path of knowledge." Ichabod was quick to deal out punishment to his school charges, always accompanied by a lecture.

Ichabod was "a huge feeder," possessed of the "dilating powers of an anaconda." We don't know about John Kerry's appetite, but this makes for a good guess. And there is the vanity parallel: "It was a matter of no little vanity to [Ichabod], on Sundays, to take his station in front of the church gallery, with a band of chosen singers; where, in his own mind, he completely carried away the psalm from the parson. Certain it is, his voice resounded far above all the rest of the congregation. . . ." Recall that Kerry's been in front of both Catholics and a largely African-American congregation these past three weeks, cameras in tow.

"[Ichabod] was in fact," Irving tells us, "an odd mixture of small shrewdness and simple credulity." Which brings to mind Kerry's approach to many subjects, from the September 11 Commission hearings to gas prices to the $87 billion for Iraq, which he famously voted both for and against.

Ichabod and Kerry can both own being skittish, enamored of an heiress, and bedeviled by a rival. Ichabod's was Brom Bones, "famed for great knowledge and skill in horsemanship, being as dexterous on horseback as a Tartar. He was foremost at all races and cock-fights; and, with the ascendancy which bodily strength acquires in rustic life, was the umpire in all disputes, setting his hat on one side, and giving his decisions with an air and tome admitting of no gainsay or appeal. He was always willing for a fight or a frolic; but had more mischief than ill-will in his composition; and with all his over-bearing roughness, there was a strong dash of waggish good humor at bottom." Who does that remind you of?

[Lost Highway]

[AmericanMade1776]

I saw an exhibit of the Hudson River Valley School, art at the Worcester Art Museum a few years back, but they were all landscapes of the Hudson Valley area.

[AnAmericanMother]

In those days - before the widespread adoption of the camera - the real money was in portraits.

But if you don't know the people involved, portraits pretty much look all alike. So most exhibitions focus on the landscapes. I like looking at portraits because human features are just about the most interesting landscape there is, but not everybody agrees . . . :-D

The HVS were probably the first semi-organized group of American artists to see wild nature as romantic spectacle rather than scary hostility to be tamed and overcome.

[AnAmericanMother]

Who is John "Obadiah Slope" Kerry's Mrs. Proudie? And who, I wonder, is his Signora Vesey Neroni?

[bholaway]

[Mr.Atos]

Hugh: ..."One of the strongest words I use is "fool," reserved for people who are genuinely lost in some absurd vision of the way the world works that is disconnected from reality. If you take John Kerry at his word, he's a fool. America cannot afford a fool as president."

Absolutely!

[onedoug]

Now see heah, Blitherington.

[A.A. Cunningham]

[IDOlog]

I've got it! Kerry reminds me of that loathsome fop called Cunningham in MGM's 1995 movie Rob Roy, starring Liam Neeson. Cunningham is the able but effete and detestable swordsman for the evil moneyed man. Man I hated that guy and the more effective he was, the more I hated him! Then common-man-with-honor Rob Roy was badly bloodied but slew him in a fair fight! It's perfect!!

[ErnBatavia]

[Barset]

Mrs. Proudie = Voters

Signora Vesey Neroni or her sister, Charlotte Stanhope, the busy schemer = Hilary Clinton

[Mr.Atos]

Oooh! Good one. Never has a more loathsome and detestable creature met such a fitting end.

Atos

[BlessedByLiberty]

There is another analogy to Al Bore - Gore always tried to prove he was a man, not an empty suit. With Kerry's manly sports pursuits,the bomber jacket,etc., he's trying to tell us that he is equal to a real man - George Bush. I think that picture of our hunky President in that flight suit was more of a challenge to Kerry's masculinity than we could ever conceive.

To see a man of Kerry's age trying to to prove he's masculine in these sports photo-ops, and hearkening back to his youth is creepy. We don't need a CIC who behaves as though he hasn't matured over the years or who is insecure in his own masculinity and that is how Kerry comes across.

[Mr.Atos]

Let me amend that statement to include the greatest depiction of justified retribution ever depicted on the big screen...

Some villians get exactly what they deserve... even if it is merely a bone-crushing blow to their political career. Say 'good-bye' to a pathetic Presidential challenger and a miserable Senator.

Atos

[IDOlog]

Huzzah! And I note that the retribution in this case just might be the detonation of the entire Democrat party, just as the aristocrat system in Scotland crumbled after, if not specifically because of, Rob Roy.

[Mr.Atos]

Well said!

[WhiteyAppleseed]

Yee-haw, laissez les bon temps rouler! Don't recall the movie, but I suspect John had his nose bloodied while growing up.

[IDOlog]

This is too much. Increasingly curious, I just looked up "Rob Roy history" on google and found this strikingly parrallel quote re Roy, W, Flowers John, islamists, appeasement, and the leftist trend in America over the past couple of decades:

"For his whole life, Rob had weathered the seasonal challenges and political threats under his parents’ protection. Now, his parents and the way of life his clan had relied upon was being swept away by political winds from as far away as... France. And his own political convictions were being formed. ... He despised needless bloodshed, and fought against the injustice that plagued his clan -- aggressively but with foresight. He was to become a hero of the Highlands."

Not only that, but he was a cattleman! Unreal!

[Note to hysterical libs: clan here refers only to Scottish political/familial organizations]

[watchin]

Wow. Waaaay back. I remember the series, and even the theme song, but not the individual characters.

[Mr.Atos]

Nice find. I am unfamiliar with the history of Rob Roy. Unlike his predecessor, William Wallace, vengeful retribution seemed tempered by diplomatic caution. The movie depicted a Man of tremendous character and profound integrity. I can certainly sense that similarity with our current President. I can also understand why he is hated so passionately by his political foes on the Left as few Democrats either champion honor, nor posses the ability to recognize it. Indeed, as with scoundrels throughout history, such men as GW are hated, despised and persecuted by them lest he expose the nature of these miserable little men, by relative stature.

Perhaps Shmeagle really is the more appropriate character for Kerry. After this election cycle he'll spend the rest of his wretched life in babbling oblivion, bottom-feeding on scraps of publicity trying desperately to re-discover his ring of power.