Mom of jailed teen: Son’s just a prisoner of love

Boston Herald ^ | Monday, February 23, 2004 | David Weber

[A. Pole]

He was 17 and she was 14, but her father went to court to keep the sweethearts apart.

Now the young man's mother says her jailed son is being punished too harshly for simply following his heart.

Kevin Bucchio, 18, has been in the Billerica House of Correction since July for violating restraining orders obtained by the parents of his girlfriend, Colleen Lambert, 15, who has compared their plight to Romeo and Juliet.

``Kevin's never been in trouble. He's not a kid who does drugs or alcohol. He just thinks he's in love,'' said his mother, Sandra Bucchio.

Michael Lambert of Pepperell, Colleen's father, acknowledges he and his wife obtained the restraining orders primarily because they thought Bucchio was too old for their daughter and that he was trying to have sex with her, not because he harmed her.

``What would you do? I'm going to defend my daughter,'' Lambert said. ``I did exactly what the (Pepperell) police told me to and exactly what the court told me to.''

But Bucchio's lawyer, who characterized the teens' relationship as ``puppy love'' gone too far, said the maximum three-year sentence his client received is unfair.

``This is a misuse of the system,'' said attorney Matthew Pingeton, who took on Bucchio's case after the youth already was in jail. ``(Colleen) loved him. She wanted to be with him. She never wanted him kept away.''

Bucchio was 17, and Lambert was two weeks shy of her 14th birthday when they first met at the movies at the Pheasant Lane Mall in Nashua, N.H., in July 2002. Lambert's parents initially liked Bucchio.

``He came over to our house a couple times. Seemed like a nice kid,'' Michael Lambert said. ``I asked him his age, and he said, `15.' I figured she's almost 14. You've got to let the reins go a little bit.''

Sandra Bucchio also thought highly of Colleen Lambert.

``I always thought she was 16. They basically would go to the mall or they would go and get something to eat,'' she said.

Then the teens exchanged baby pictures, and Lambert's parents noticed Bucchio's birth year was 1985.

``The kid was lying to my face,'' Michael Lambert said. ``From there, we realized he was up to no good.''

Lambert telephoned Sandra Bucchio and said he feared her son was trying to steal his daughter's innocence. He said he did not sense the same level of concern from Sandra Bucchio.

Lambert ordered his daughter to stop seeing Bucchio, but Sandra Bucchio said the girl continued to telephone her son at odd hours of the night. The girl's parents eventually forbade her from using their phone or computer e-mail, but the pair found ways to rendezvous outside their homes.

Michael Lambert charged that Bucchio snuck around his house at night and slept in the back yard several times.

On the advice from a friend on the Pepperell police force, Lambert and his wife, Paula, went to Ayer District Court on Aug. 8, 2002, on behalf of their daughter and obtained a restraining order against Bucchio. The order was extended to a year, and the parents returned to court numerous times because Bucchio violated the order repeatedly.

At the same time, Lambert sent poems and notes to Bucchio with passages such as, ``All I could think was that I don't have nothing if I don't have Kevin! You mean everything to me hunnie (sic) and we will get through this. We have to! Romeo + Juliet!''

In July 2003, Judge Paul McGill sentenced Bucchio to 75 days in the Billerica House of Correction for failure to comply with the order. Within hours of landing in jail, Bucchio violated the order again, arranging to leave a phone message for the girl. He told her he did not blame her for his incarceration and wished her a happy 15th birthday.

As a result, McGill imposed a maximum two-year sentence that had been suspended for an earlier violation and tacked on another six months for the jailhouse transgression.

Court spokeswoman Joan Kenney said McGill could not comment on the case while it is in the process of being appealed by Bucchio and his lawyers.

Paul Martinek, editor of the Lawyers Weekly publications, said he was disturbed by the case.

``Certainly, on the surface, it strikes me an oddly harsh punishment without any evidence that (Kevin) did this girl any harm or evidence that he even threatened her in the first place,'' Martinek said, adding that judges tend to err on the side of caution and grant restraining orders.

``Judges are terrified these days of not issuing restraining orders for fear that something tragic is going to happen, and they'll find themselves on the front page of the Herald,'' he said.

Middlesex District Attorney Martha Coakley, whose office handled the case, defended the sentence imposed by McGill, saying, ``A judge can't have a young man keep coming in front of him and essentially saying he's not going to obey the court's order.''

Meanwhile, Bucchio's mother constantly worries about her son's ability to cope behind bars.

``He's not street-smart. He's had a very rough time in there,'' she said, noting that another inmate beat him up. ``He's not a tough kid. I dread it every time I go up to visit him. Sometimes he makes the best of it; sometimes he's upset. I try to make him feel as good as I can.''

[stuartcr]

There was a time when this was not illegal...it's just relative.

[Nataku X]

There's no such thing as a teenage boy in love. Fathers know this, that's why they're so protective of their little girls.

[A. Pole]

There's no such thing as a teenage boy in love.

So Shakespeare got it wrong?

[Flyer]

Since when is 17 an adult?

In Texas, males are subject to adult laws and courts at 17.

[Nataku X]

Romeo was 12 years old... probably still had his head screwed on right then :)

[Iscool]

Very stupid on the part of the parents of the girl...There are ways to deal with the problem without someone going to jail...
If they are still a couple when he gets out of jail, they will not gain a son...They will lose a daughter...

[Oztrich Boy]

He's the one that broke the law and he got what he deserved.

When the US adopts Sharia Law families will be able to prevent their daughters from shaming the family honor.

[af_vet_1981]

that's what you came away with after reading my post? That's just out in left field.

Just what do you think a 17-18 y.o. boy and a 14-15 y.o. girl are likely to do in such romantic circumstances ?

Or is your solution to simply put the girl on birth control ?

[midcop402]

In Michigan, 17 year olds can be arrested and incarcerated. The age gap, while not so severe as others, is very problematic. My experience indicates that it is not so much as the maturity of the 14/15 year old, as the immaturity of the 18 year old. The parents of the girl have the right to restrict his contact. As long as they are legally responsible for the girl they have every right to get a retraining order.
I think a little more investigation will reveal that this is a high risk relationship of which has resulted in violence in similar cases. I have dealt directly and indirectly with similar situations, and they generally do not end nicely.
I know how difficult it is to restrict communication of your juvenile with others. Both my wife and I are required to have phones for our employement, so shutting off the phone is not an option. Email is much more easily controlled with password controls.
The 18 year knew the ramifications of his continued contact and yet he still defied the court order as well as the girls parents. If he had even a smidgeon of respect for the girl, he would have either terminated the relationship OR attempted to start over and work with whatever restrictions the parents put in place. The fact that he lied to her parents basically screws him in my book! This shows he had no respect for her or her parents. I think the restraining order was well justified. I have recommended this action in the past and will do so in the future for similar situations.

[nmh]

"There was a time when this was not illegal...it's just relative."

Fortunately having sex with a child IS illegal and responsible parents are NOT "relative" when it comes to protecting their daughters from statutory rape.

[nmh]

You asked a good question

"Since when is 17 not an adult?"

It NEVER has been considered an adult in the U.S.. You may want to make a note of that. In states it varies from 18 and 21 as the age for an adult.

Your other comment shows your cold cynicism. I let that speak for itself.

[Bikers4Bush]

How do you equate violating a restraining order to Sharia Law?

[RussianConservative]

If he not criminal before entry, he will be in end....great judicial system.

[Bikers4Bush]

"It NEVER has been considered an adult in the U.S."

That is a bald faced lie. Criminals under the age of 18 are routinely prosecuted as adults.

[RussianConservative]

It would be something he they meet up after jail when she adult and tell her father to shove it. Anyone ever hear shaperon date? Till she's 16. If he interested enough, he survive that problem....at 14 I not allow my dauthers (neither that age yet) to see any boy on date without adult, even if boy 14 or 13.

[RussianConservative]

So how is this system work: girl father puts restraining order on her behalf on the boy...right? Now if girl comes to see the boy, is it still the boy's fault?

[nmh]

That is a bald faced lie. Criminals under the age of 18 are routinely prosecuted as adults.

No it is not a lie. It is RECENTLY that crimes have been so hideous by minors that ADULT punishment is considered. Under the age of 18 is considered an MINOR. They are NOT routinely punished as an adult.

[RussianConservative]

Romeo was 12 years old...

I do not remember that in readings.

[stuartcr]

It is relative, because it depends on what state or country you are from, as whether or not it is illegal.

[Bikers4Bush]

It's an absolute lie. Prosecuting those under 18 as adults has now become routine. For adult crimes they are punsihed as adults. He committed an adult crime.