I'm going to go out on a limb here, and try to be as tactful as I can - Tact has never really been a strong characterof mine, so I beg your forgiveness in advance, but I just want to say one thig in response to this...
No one is forcing you to read this thread, and I think it is very presumptuous to come into a public forum so soon after a loss such as the one you have suffered, and start slamming people because they voice an opinion about it that you don't like.
Your grief is understandable, and I can respect that, but when you bring stuff like this into a public forum, you are going to encounter things you probably don't want to read - that's part of discussion in a public forum, when you are dealing with people from a wide range of backgrounds, experiences, personal histories, and belief systems.
So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, that this topic is probably very painful for you, justifiably, but don't be blaming others for making the pain worse - no one here is to blame, and neither are you.