Ouch! Some of those are nasty! If it weren't for Philadelphia, Pennsylvania would be a lot better. I like living here.
I really do love my home state of Pennsylvania and if I could make as much money in PA as I do outside of PA, I might never have left. Well, no I probably would have left but I might have come back. Maybe. Anyway, I love the food, and the forests and the old houses. My parents complain about traffic if there is one car in front of them at one of the few traffic lights in their town. People identify other people by what church they go to and who they are related to:
You know[pronounced “Juno”] Dorris? She goes to first Presby and was Annie’s second cousin on her mother’s side…well the other day she did the craziest thing…
Directions are given by sending you to landmarks that aren’t there any more:
Jus go dawn to where Bill’s barn burned down, turn left ‘n’ drive ‘til you pass where da ol’ Jint Igle used to be, dan yur close. Should be on da left, cross from Jimmy’s sister place. Juno, she goes to dat Catholic church wit her Eye-talian husband…
Suddenly I could go for a sammich with chip-chopped ham and a pop.
PENNSYLVANIA: DUMB BUT SIMPLE