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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
The list is funny, but in all truth, American women are the source of most of their own troubles, when it comes to romance and dating.

There are many unattached men who are not physically repulsive, not financially destitute, not emotionally crippled, and not homosexual. Most single women aren't interested in these men. They're not glamorous, not exciting, not extravagant, not redolent of fantasy, and not arm candy. What, you thought the concept only worked in one direction? I assure you, that blade slices both sexes.

Where would a realistic single woman find such a man? Not in a bar or a nightclub. Somewhere that decent single men of adequate masculine quality spend their free time. Churches. Volunteer organizations. Groups that coalesce around various interests, such as boating, books, theater, folk music, bicycling and hiking, foreign language practice, and so forth. Look into those groups, ladies. You might think there are no suitable men out there entirely because you've been looking in the wrong places for them.

The techniques for finding and bagging a suitable husband are ancient, well known, and reliable. The trouble is, they require that the woman zero in on her choice, present herself to him in an attractive manner, and then induce him to move on her -- "A man chases a woman until she catches him." Most women of our day don't have the patience for this, nor are they willing to expend the effort to make themselves attractive for their men, nor are they willing to do the things that are most appealing to the male ego during courtship, most especially get him talking about the things that fascinate him, then shut up and listen to him with something he could legitimately mistake for interested attention.

There's one last hurdle to leap, though: Because of the prevalence of gender-war psychology and male-bashing among American women, and because so many of them play double-bind games to paint a man as a lowlife regardless of what he does, many men simply will not make the first move. They're afraid of you, ladies. They think you hate them, or hold them in contempt. And a surprising number of you do, by my entirely idiosyncratic researches.

Examples? If a man holds a door for a woman, she can call him a chauvinist. If he fails to do so, she can call him an insensitive cad. I once watched a young woman do both of these things -- to two different men, of course -- within five minutes' time. If a woman interrupts a man in conversation and the man takes exception, he's called petty or wimpish; if a man interrupts a woman, he's called an unmannerly brute -- and yes, I've seen a woman do both of these things, as well.

So, ladies: You have to find your man. You have to make yourself appealing to him and put yourself in his way. You have to induce him to approach you, or you have to approach him in an innocent way. You have to hold his interest while he goes through the process Stendhal called "crystallization," in which he comes to realize that he can't live without you. Then you have to say "Yes." And the order is important.

For further reflections on the dating minefield, click here.

Freedom, Wealth, and Peace,
Francis W. Porretto
Visit the Palace Of Reason: http://palaceofreason.com

51 posted on 01/20/2002 7:15:17 AM PST by fporretto
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To: fporretto
Try this web site for a different, but similar view

http://www.Fredoneverything.net/AsianWomen.html

69 posted on 01/20/2002 8:25:13 AM PST by freesthinker
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To: fporretto
All you women out there need to remember that it is the Mothers of the world that form the character of all men, so what you get is what you have created, and you keep dooing it over and over and over.......
74 posted on 01/20/2002 9:07:14 AM PST by .45MAN
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To: fporretto
Somewhere that decent single men of adequate masculine quality spend their free time. Churches. Volunteer organizations . . .

. . . math and computer science departments . . .

87 posted on 01/20/2002 10:21:24 AM PST by AmishDude
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To: fporretto
Your post may be the single most intelligent, and intructional thing ever posted on FreeReepublic.

Unfortunately, it whizzed past a bunch of dyed and blow dried heads. Women are happiest when they can bemoan their self-inflicted misery to another.

119 posted on 01/20/2002 11:36:21 AM PST by FreedomFarmer
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