It's nice to have FRiends! ; )
For more "Too Much Coffee Man" click here. Have a great day FReepers, Vets and Servicemen/women!
YOU KNOW YOU DRINK TOO MUCH COFFEE WHEN....
Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
You speed walk in your sleep.
You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake.
You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
You chew on other people's fingernails.
The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
Cocaine is a downer.
All your kids are named "Joe."
Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."
You don't sweat, you percolate.
You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
People get dizzy just watching you.
Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.
Your Thermos is on wheels.
Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position.
You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
You short out motion detectors.
You don't tan, you roast.
You introduce your spouse as your "Coffeemate."
You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation."
When someone asks, "How are you?", you reply: "Good to the last drop."
***********
One night at McChord Air Force Base in Washington, I was dispatched to check out the security fence where an alarm had gone off. The fence was at the end of the base runway. When I got to the scene, I found that a raccoon was the culprit, so I ran around and flapped my arms to scare off the animal.
Suddenly an air-traffic controller came over the public-address system and announces loudly, "Attention to the airman at the end of the runway. You are cleared for takeoff."
It's nice to have FRiends! ; )
For more "Too Much Coffee Man" click here. Have a great day FReepers, Vets and Servicemen/women!