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Posted on 02/05/2005 7:06:23 AM PST by snippy_about_it
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 are acknowledged, affirmed and commemorated.
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| Our Mission: The FReeper Foxhole is dedicated to Veterans of our Nation's military forces and to others who are affected in their relationships with Veterans. In the FReeper Foxhole, Veterans or their family members should feel free to address their specific circumstances or whatever issues concern them in an atmosphere of peace, understanding, brotherhood and support. The FReeper Foxhole hopes to share with it's readers an open forum where we can learn about and discuss military history, military news and other topics of concern or interest to our readers be they Veteran's, Current Duty or anyone interested in what we have to offer. If the Foxhole makes someone appreciate, even a little, what others have sacrificed for us, then it has accomplished one of it's missions. We hope the Foxhole in some small way helps us to remember and honor those who came before us.
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 THE REAL NAVY! Here are a few suggestion for those people on how they can experience Navy life, right in the comfort of their own homes. Buy a dumpster, paint it gray and live in it for 6 months straight. Run all of the piping and wires inside your house on the outside of the drywall. Pump 10 inches of nasty, crappy water into your basement, then pump it out, clean up, and paint the basement " deck gray. " Every couple of weeks, dress up in your best clothes and go to the scummiest part of town, find the most run down, trashy bar you can, pay $10 for a beer until you are hammered, then walk home in the freezing cold. Perform a weekly disassembly and inspection of your lawnmower. On Mondays. Wednesdays, and Fridays turn your water temperature up to 200 degrees, then on Tuesdays and Thursday turn it down to 10 degrees. on Saturdays and Sundays declare to your entire family that they used too much water during the week, so all showering is secured. Raise your bed to within 36 inches of the ceiling.  Have your next door neighbor come over each day at 5am and blow a whistle so loud that Helen Keller could hear it and shout, "Reveille, reveille, all hands heave out." Have you mother-in-law write down everything she's going to do the next day and read it to you. Eat the raunchiest Mexican food you can find for 3 days straight, then lock the bathroom door for 12 hours, and hang a sign on it that reads "secured, contact OA DIV at X-3053." Submit a written request form to your father-in-law, asking if it's o.k. for you to leave your house before 3pm. Invite 200 of your not-so-closest friends to come over, then board up all the windows and doors to your house for 6 months. After 6 months is up, take down the boards, and since you're on duty, wave at your friends and family through the front window of your home.... you can't leave until the next day. Shower with above mentioned friends. Make your family qualify to operate all the appliances in your home, for example, become a dishwasher operator, blender technician etc... Walk around your car for 4 hours and checking the tires pressure every 15 minutes. Sit in your car and let it run for 4 hours before going anywhere. This is to ensure your engine is properly " lit off " Empty all the garbage bins in your house, and sweep your driveway 3 times a day, whether they need it or not. Repaint your entire house once a month. Cook all of your food blindfolded, grabbing for any spice and seasoning you can get your hands on. Now, chow down! you have 5 minutes.... Have your neighbor collect all your mail for a month. losing every 5th item. Spend $20,000 on a satellite system for your TV, but only watch CNN and the weather channel. Have your 5 year old cousin give you a haircut with goat shears. Sew back pockets to the front of your pants. Spend 2 weeks in the red-light districts of Europe and call it "world travel ." " Needle gun " the aluminum siding on your house after your neighbors have gone to bed. When your children are in bed, run into their room with a megaphone, and shout at the top of your lungs that your home is under attack and order them to man their battle stations. Post a menu on the refrigerator door informing your family that you are having steak for dinner. then make them wait in line for at least an hour, when they finally get to the kitchen, tell them that you are out of steak, but you have dried ham and hot dogs. repeat daily until they don't pay attention to the menu anymore and they just ask for hot dogs. In the middle of January, place a podium at the end of your driveway. Have your family stand watches at the podium, rotating at 4 hour intervals. Lock yourself and your family in your house for 6 weeks. then tell them that at the end of the 6th week, you're going to take them to Disneyland for " weekend liberty ". when the end of the 6th week rolls around, inform them that Disneyland has been canceled due to the fact that they need to get ready for E-cert, and that it will be another week before they can leave the house.      |
Remember, you can get more done with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word!!!
The neighbors might complain though, he he
Regards
alfa6 ;>}
Sure . . . the limp d's in the MSM.
But not hero's like Gen. James Mattis.
Damn straight!
Regards
alfa6 ;>}
LOL. Damn straight is right. Sam was telling me about the trouble this General was in. Reprimanded. Darn shame.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA
One of the microwave ovens at the office died toady. Well the control panel died, but the magnetron is still functional. Now to put my evil plan into action.
About 15 years ago, I read an article about converting a microwave oven into a high power transceiver useful in the 2.4GHz ham radio band. I finally have an organ donor oven.
Cooked bunny rabbits, and earth-moon-earth communications, here I come.
I received an e-mail that my friend, Lt. Paul, is coming home from Iraq. He's due to leave 11FEB, and return to Ft. Sill.
LOL. You sound like a kid in a candy store that's been handed the keys!
Wonderful news!
Good news PE!
Fifty years ago my father told my older brothers about heads on USS Saratoga (CV-3). My impression at the time was that "you should have thought of that before leaving home" applied.
OMGOSH I love Hagar! Fantastic.
Evening PE.
Is that the "Flying Nun"?
Lot less work in mortars. :-)
I would have gone bonkers after the first day in a boat. Your story just confirms it. Thanks for sharing your some of your experience of Navy life.
We sent sent guys to Supply for a box of Grid Squares. :-)
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
DVD's will be obsolete but keep the fire extinguisher handy. ;-)
Give us your phone number and we can arrange it for you. ;-)
My favorite Navy T-shirt had a picture of a Boomer sailing away on the surface, in the background was a mushroom cloud. The saying on it was:
24 empty tubes
A mushroom Cloud
Now... It's Miller Time.
:-)
Quad Fifties!! When you really want to make a lasting impression.
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