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Do you use your participation in sacred music that way?

Let me put it this way, when I was cantoring and "song leading" (I have a solo voice which really is not conducive to that form), in order to present the material the way I did, to the best of my ability, required preparation. Usually at least an hour a week to work out the phrasing, the line, etc. I just would not wing it (which drove the music director nuts and me nuts when he'd change the material without telling me, sometimes in the middle of Mass). That's just how I was taught and how I am. Just showing up and sightreading without rehearsal, IMO, is not respectful of God, Mass, the congregation. It just isn't. As a result, I found myself not assisting the way I should and instead was more cognizant of the music than I was paying attention to Mass. So, I started going to Mass twice a weekend, once for me and once to more or less perform.

I took this last year off after years of more or less being walked on and risking serious damage to my voice and started attending Mass elsewhere and sitting in the congregation. I kind of like being a congregant. There's no pressure and Mass becomes less a choreography of parts than one flowing, seemless, timeless Sacrafice. That doesn't mean that I'm not available when needed. I spent quite a bit of time this morning working on the Bach/Gounod Ave Maria. It's the Hail Mary, not just notes on a page. I had to remind myself. It sounded too stilted, at least to my ears. That's what it takes to make it beautiful and inspiring and that's my job.

So, there you have it. Confessions of a soprano. I know others who do the same thing I do. Go to Mass multiple times a weekend as a congregant rather than a performer. It makes a difference.

Make that go to Mass multiple times a weekend - one for self and the others for the congregation.

Singing is praying twice, but I admire you for attending two Masses on Sunday.

When I sung in the choir for a Low Tridentine Mass (Offertory and Communion Hymns), I didn't find this distracting from attending Mass - I also winged it since I knew the songs. Same for serving Mass as an Altar Boy. When singing, it helped to be up in the choir loft looking at the Altar, rather than in the sanctuary performing to the people.