Posted on 11/23/2002 5:07:20 PM PST by Ex-Wretch
It at least gives pause to the idea of remarrying the same person after they have remarried and divorced again. Yes, it's Old Testament....but until one ascertains the reason behind this law (and God calls it detestable), then one should be cautious. Perhaps it is some form of fornication/pornei. Perhaps it's "manipulating serial monogamy" that God opposes. Perhaps there is some actual biological issue involved.
Deuteronomy 24 1 If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, 2 and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, 3 and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, 4 then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD . Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.
Deu 24:4 Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that [is] abomination before the LORD: and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which the LORD thy God giveth thee [for] an inheritance.
Of course, this would require a truly submissive spirit unto the Lord to do it.
I think that you make an excellent point. This is another reason why we are not to be too hasty in laying hands on any man.
I am not going to say that divorce and remarriage automatically disqualifies a man from the pastorate, but I think that he is going to face an uphill climb. He is going to have to demonstrate a definite calling from God along with a clear understanding of the factors leading to his marital break-up before I am going to participate in his ordination.
Something that keeps coming to my mind and I don't think it has been referred to yet is Genesis 2:24.
"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."
If two people are one flesh, they divorce and either (or both) of them remarry, are they "one flesh" with their new spouse? If so, this leads me to wonder how many times can a person become "one"?
Just another something to consider.
Question: What constitutes being a "good steward" (I hope you're not going to say keeping them all together "at all costs")
It's a good question, cj.
The "low" view is that "one flesh" simply means they become joined in a new person....i.e., a baby. Their children are a combination of them.
A "higher" view is that they are intertwined in spirit via the union of the flesh to such an extent that they can grow to an incredible unity of heart, mind, and purpose.
I believe, in addition to the "higher" view above, that there is an actual biological something that occurs when they share intercourse with one another. I think their bodies "adapt" or "adjust" to the presence of the other.
Is it possible that there are biological illnesses that result from having too many sex partners and confusing the "oneness" law that you so appropriately point out?
Most "younger" married people have watched fairy tales where it is ALWAYS happily ever after..then they got older and they see projected in movies and TV (and the culture in general) "If it feels good do it"..If you are not "happy" then you need to go find "happiness" So you have Liz Taylor with a string of spouses
If you ask almost any long married couple you will find out there were many times they were NOT happy in that marriage ..or that they no longer "loved" their spouse.
But here is the truth love is an evolving emotion..there is the crazy hormonal sexual love , thus the desire to be with and touch ALL the time..It is the "burning breast " that the Mormons speak of..then there is the phase where it quiets and starts to become a more steady dependent emotion...needing the other for support and help and assurance along with the sexual componant...the craziness goes and the major marker is an enduring friendship..and mutual admiration.
Moving through the various stages ..and sometimes swinging between them can cause alot of emotional times..
I have been married 41 years..there were at least three times I wanted to 'pack it in"..I stayed and worked them through because we had kids AND I have a COVENANT with God and my Husband..I did not stay for ME
I am being very blunt here, because I think it is important for people raised in broken homes and people with only one parent , that have never seen adults WORKING out their marriage , to understand marriage is not a fairytale..it is a living contract that needs constant updating and flexibility. Love changes ..we change , what we want changes it is work
First, second or third conversion! ;^)
Is the remarried person living in adultery if he asks forgivness yet continues to live with the second spouse?
If a valid marriage ends in a civil divorce, then remarriage seems to be an oxymoron. While the first wife lives can there be a valid marriage between the divorced husband and another woman?
Today's marriages are discarded at an alarming rate. If one is not "happy", then they'll just get a divorce.
I also agree with xzins's "higher view" in #48: "they are intertwined in spirit via the union of the flesh to such an extent that they can grow to an incredible unity of heart, mind, and purpose."
Are there biblical allowances for divorce? Yes, and those have been (and are being) discussed on this thread. But "I'm not happy" and "I don't love you anymore" and "I just don't want to be married anymore" are NOT biblically justified reasons to walk away from a marriage.
Marriage is a God-ordained, God-given lifelong commitment to love, honor and cherish the one whom God has given you. Is it always easy? No. Is it always happy? No. But it is a commitment and today's "easy come, easy go" society today doesn't seem to understand that concept.
They have all seen us work out our marriage and they expect to do the same.
Personal witness is one of the best tools we have to pass on the faith.
Does it really matter,anymore?
Pokin' a little fun at Mom.
Actually, divorce is at a horendous rate. What is it now? 6 out of 10. Its awful. And so many suffer from this sin. A good example of how public sin really is!
The first recorded "offical" marriage was I believe Ahab and Jezebel ...Before that time a man taking his "bride " into his tent and having sex with her constituted a marriage
On that topic God say and the two became one flesh
If in Gods eyes sex seals a marriage..then kids, that have slept with a series of people are ACTUALLY married to the first one and all others after that (including the one they had a ceremony with) are 'adulterous'
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