I could never understand how, once knowing the truth, you could exchange it for the great Calvinist lie. Perhaps this is the erroreous presupposition that caused the problem. Those are NOT the range of available choices.
The truth is God knew and cared, but had committed to allow man (and other beings) the use of his/their free will and that free will brought about the evil and the continued evil that we see. God's voluntary refusal to rein in the evil in the world is not the result of a lack of care or a lack of knowledge, but because He so values fellowship with a voluntary being and the tolerance of that evil is the price of that fellowship.
So, the irrational evil which you (and all of us) have experienced is NOT -- NOT -- NOT imposed on us by the evil-spirited god of the Calvinist construct, but is the result of the evil of this world which is tolerated by the loving God of the Bible as the price of true fellowship with His voluntary and volitional created beings.
Me heart breaks that the only way you can reconcile the irrational evil which you (and all of us) have experienced in this life is to join in the Calvinist slander of the loving Nature of the True God -- and attrribute it to Him.
So, the irrational evil which you (and all of us) have experienced is NOT -- NOT -- NOT imposed on us by the evil-spirited god of the Calvinist construct, but is the result of the evil of this world which is tolerated by the loving God of the Bible as the price of true fellowship with His voluntary and volitional created beings.
It should also be mentioned that God's perfect and terrible justice will be served upon those who do commit evil precisely because they chose to commit evil. I mean, really, if every single thing that has ever happened or ever will happen can be directly attributed to God's tyrannical control of all situations, then He really has no one to blame but Himself, right?