I have always dreaded funerals homes and burial services, etc. .... I don’t wish to put my family through it, so please handle my passing as follows.
I want no funeral home viewings or services. I want to be simply and quietly cremated. I’d like my ashes saved until one of my children or grandchildren plants a tree in their yard ... my ashes to be added to the tree roots.
The tree will grow over the years to the point where its strong branches will support a swing for children to play on ... its broad leafs will provide shade over the driveway, cooling the family car ... its smaller branches will provide a welcome short resting place for a busy sparrow or robin ... from which, filthy creatures that they are, they can poop on the family car windshield.
In this way I might be kindly remembered in the future any time you discover bird crap on your windshield.
That’s just it. Birds poop on the car and leaves have to be swept off the driveway so your tree would get chopped down. Also, kids aren’t allowed to play outside and these precious little bubbles might fall and get hurt on a swing.