PROFITING FROM PROVERBS

“He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes” (Proverbs 13:24).

“Betimes” is a word that basically means, “as needed.” Now, no kid wants to feel the rod, but the Word surely tells us that they need it from time to time to direct them. There are a number of passages in the Book of Proverbs that deal with child training and child discipline. This verse is one of the best of the bunch. The rod in view here is the same as the shepherd’s rod of Psalm 23, “Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.”

The error most people make is they believe the rod is all about pain and punishment, but David wrote that they were for comfort, they help to establish boundaries in a young person’s life. Good, godly boundaries give a sense of security. A young boy in a fenced in yard has complete freedom to go anywhere and do anything within the bounds of that fence. He may live on a busy thoroughfare with cars speeding back and forth, but within those walls he need not fear what is taking place on the roadway.

One of the best tools a parent can use with his child is the shepherd’s rod, a half-inch or three-quarter inch dowel pin. As long as it is wielded in love, and not in baseless anger, God heartily approves and even commands it. Our purpose is to mold the clay, and not to break the spirit. There used to be an old poem which read, “You can get your lick with a hickory stick.”

The world has been conditioned to think that corporal punishment is abusive and hateful. Now, it can be, if punishment is administered in anger. When a parent is angry, it is easy to go overboard and do more damage than good. In those instances, criminal charges are to be expected. Parent, when you decide it is necessary to use corporal punishment, get away by yourself for a few moments and spend some time with God and calm down your emotions. Only when you know that you are under control should you proceed. Always pray first by yourself, and then with your child—and make sure that you both understand that it is for the good and not some act of brutality.

We need to love our children to the extent that we are willing to do whatever is necessary to do whatever we can to see that our children grow up to be respectful of authority and grow up on the right side of the law.

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