It is often the mother who is problematic. We cannot know what abusive mothers went through which warped them so decidedly. I am sorry that you dear brother was unable to deal with the pain, I am happy that you are as whole and happy as you can be.
Thank you. I have been very fortunate. I did learn some lessons and was lucky enough to find such a special woman.
Even still, I did come a little close to making a big mistake before I met her. The ex husband of that near mistake told me many years later that I owed him for saving me the 11 years of hell he got, LOL. Nice guy. He's had a successful 2nd marriage fortunately.