marajade,
Please read this post: https://www.freerepublic.com/focus/religion/3721260/posts?page=137#137
Which sheds light from the Apostle Paul.
And be at peace.
Those who are miserable in guilt based rituals want others to be as miserable as they are.
I know my heart is in the right place in my belief.
How do I know? I used to be a baptized and confirmed Lutheran. My family still are.
My father is abusive and I asked the priest what my mother should do, ie., divorce, etc. His response was my mother just didn’t love him enough.
I realized that day organized religion was a joke and never stepped inside the Lutheran church again.
The Catholic Church is even worse.