‘Does that mean He didn’t really order the extermination of eight separate nations because that would have been “mean?”’
I assume you’re talking about the Old Testamnet. That was His will. If that makes no sense, it’s because the Incarnation and the new Covenant changed the human understanding and appearance of God’s will, from Jewish centered to all mankind. If that still makes no sense, that’s ok, because it’s in inspired Scripture, so we believe it.
I myself had no doubts that G-d can, and in these instances did, order the extermination of certain whole nations. My question was whether the Catholic Church did, or if, as with evolution, it has allowed its social prejudice against American "trailer trash" to alter its teachings.